Showing posts with label Hindi Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hindi Jokes. Show all posts

Santa Ko Ek Sunder Si Ladki Pasand Aa Gayi,-------------
Aur Usne Us Se Baatchit Shuru Ki--------------

Ladki Asal Mein Ek Call Girl Thii Par Ye Baat
Santa Ko Pata Nahi Thhi----------------
Dono Mein Prem Pyar Kuch Din Chala Aur--------------
Ladki Bhi Santa Ke Bholepan Se Imress Ho Ke------------
Usko Pyar Karne Lagi----------------
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Ek Din Satna Ne Usko Bol Diya Ki Mere Se
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Shadi Kar Le.
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Ab Bechari Ladki Pareshan Ho Gayi Ki Isko To
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Pahli Rat Mein Hi Pata Lag Jayega Ki Main
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Badi Buri Tarha Se Chudi Hun
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Ladki Ne Apni Saheli Se Ye Baat Discuss Ki,
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Saheli Ne Idea Diya
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Saheli: “Jaisi Hi Vo Tere Andar Dale Jor Jor
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Se Chikhna Shuru Kar Dena Aur Rone Lag
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Jana”
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Ladki: “Haan Ye Baat Thik Hai, Is Se Usko
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Lagega Ki Main Virgin Hun”
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Ye Soch Ke Ladki Ne Santa Se Shadi Kar Li
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Suhagrat Wale Din Santa Ne Jaisi Hi Uske
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Ander Dala Ladki Chikhne Lag Gayi
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Santa Ne Thoda Sa Aur Ander Dala To Ladki
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Zor Zor Se Rone Ka Drama Karne Lag Gayi
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Santa Ne Pucha: “Janu Kya Hua Rone Kyu Lag
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Gayi?”
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Ladki: “Bada Dard Ho Raha Hai Ji, Meri Jaan
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Nikle Ja Rahi Hai”
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Ye Sun Ke Santa Bhi Zor Zor Se Rone Lag
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Gaya
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Ladki Ne Hairan Hoke Santa Se Pucha
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Ladki: “Arrey Aap Kyu Rone Lag Gaye?”

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Santa: “Bhonsdi Ki, Mere To Tatte Tak Ander Chale Gaye Hai Isliye Ro Raha Hun“
the top 15 adult jokes here i tell you, i am sure you never feel boring after read this jokes.

A GIRL GOES OUT OF TOWN WITH HER BF FOR DATE.
WELL THEY ENJOYED SEX OUTSIDE THE TOWN.
THE GIRL TELL THE BOY I FORGET TO TELL U
THAT I AM ACTUALLY PROSTITUTE
AND CHARGE RS.200 FOR SINGLE.
THE BOY GAVE HER THE MONEY SHE ASKED FOR.
THE BOY GET SIT IN HIS CAR.
THE GIRL COME ALONG WITH HIM AND SIT IN CAR.
THE BOY ASK YES MADAM.
GIRL SAID.. LET GET BACK TO TOWN NA..
THE BOY SAID OH I FORGET TO TELL U
THAT I AM TAXI DRIVER AND I WILL CHARGE RS.250 FOR TOWN.
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 Hindi funny Hot Non Veg Adult Desi Jokes Collection
Suhagrat Ke Baad Sabse muskil kaam kya hai?

One friend asks to another friend:
Q: shadi ke baad, first night sabse muskil kaam kya hai?
Ans: wife se baat karna!.......No.
Kiss and sex karna…..no yaar.
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 Hindi Non Veg Jokes, Adult Hot Porn Sexy Hindi Joke
Hindi Non Veg Jokes, Adult Hot Porn Sexy Hindi Joke

Sex k dauran amir Girl apne Garib premi se: Tumhra itna bada kaise? Premi emotional hote hue: Garibi k karan bachpan me mere pas aur koi khilona nhi tha....

PATI Suhagraat Pe PATNI K Nipple Chuste Huve:

Tumhare Nipples Kitne Narm Garm or Sharbati hai"

PATNI (sharmate huye) :
Pata nahi ji
Jitne Muh
Utni Baatein"...
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Sindhi's Son: Papa mere dur ki nazar kharab ho gayi hai, naye SPECS banwa do... !
Sindhi : bahar chal, woh kya hai aasman mai?
Sindhi's son: Papa woh chand hai.
Sindhi: Isse dur kya bhenchod pariyo ki gaand dekhega???
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Koyal samza jinhe,
Bhosdike wo kauwe nikle,
Dosti ke naam pe madarchod bhadwe nikle,Jo roka karte the hame chodne se,
Bhenchod unki hi jeb se
condom nikle...
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Boy: Panditji, ek hi ''Gotra'' me shaadi kar sakte hain kya...?

Modern Pandit: Gotra koi bhi ho chalega, kintu "MUTRA" ka marg ek jaisa nahi hona chahiye

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SEX Poem. fuck ne hard....n fuck me deep.... Don"t stop....until i weep suck my boobs....n kiss my lips Go on baby.....shake my hips I love the feel of u in my pussy ek baat kahun....kya chodte ho tusi .... Eat my pussy.....like burger of MCD chodo mujhe....faad k mari chaddhi woofer mai teri....tu mera amplfier kisi aur ko chod ke aaya hai na....u liar? faad di hai tune....aaj mari fuddi Aise hi chodte rehna. jb tk mai ho na jaun buddhi. muh me lena ka aaj man hai mera... taiyar ho ja.lund pe raja k sehra

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As a woman passed her daughter 's
closed bedroom door , she heard a
strange buzzing noise coming from
within.. . Opening the door , she
observed her daughter
With a vibrator .
Shocked, she asked: 'what in the
world are you doing ?'
The daughter replied : 'Mum , I 'm
thirty- five years old , unmarried, and
this thing is about as close as I' ll ever
get to a husband . Please, go away and
leave me alone.'
The next day , the girl 's father heard
the same buzz coming from the other
side of the closed bedroom door .
Upon entering the room, he observed
his Daughter making passionate love
to her vibrator.
To his query as to what she was
doing, the daughter said: 'dad I 'm
thirty- five , unmarried , and this thing is
about as close as I 'll ever get to a
husband .. Please , go away and leave
me alone.'
A couple days later, the wife came
home from a shopping trip, placed
the groceries on the kitchen counter,
and heard that buzzing noise coming
from, of all places, the living room.
She entered that area and observed
her husband sitting on the couch ,
downing a cold beer , and staring at
the TV.. ... . The vibrator was next to
him on the couch, buzzing like crazy .
The wife asked : 'What the hell are you
doing?'
The husband replied : 'I' m watching
football with my Son-in- law.
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Tanaav Door karne k liye yoga:-

Table par whisky ki bottle, namkin or glass rakhe.
Chair par v, Whisky ko glass me dale, Halke se sip le,
Namkin khaye, Phir sip le.
Is kriya ko 7 baar dohraye
Sar piche jhukae, Dono hath sar k peche rakhe,
Aankhe dhire se band karte hue bole
"Maa Chudaye Duniya"

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Munni nahaney gayi
kapre utari
darwaza baja
Munni: KAUN?

Jawab aaya: POSTMAN

Kapre pehen k letter leya

phir nahane gayi kapre utari
darwaza baja
boli: KAUN?

Jawab aya: DHOBI

Kapre pehen k dhobi se hisab kiya.

Phir nahane gayi
kapre utari
darwza baja
Munni phir boli: KAUN ?

Jawab aya: sameer
padosan ka beta jo ANDHA hai

Munni ne socha kya farq padtha hain agar kapre nahi pehni
aise he chali gayi
darwza khola
Sameer ne mitaai di

MUNNI: kis khushi mein

Sameer: meri Aankhain teek ho gayi hain

AB PATA CHALA Munni KAISE badnam huyi..

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(G)OLD Joke !
Photographer studio me chote bache se :

"Beta camera ki taraf dekho, isme se kabutar niklega"

Bacha : sun be gawaro wali batein mat kar.
Focus adjust kar,
Aur potrait mode use kariyo
with macro.
High resolution me pic
Aani chahiye Facebook par lagani hai.
Werna kabutar kaise udate hain Mai btaunga
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1 Pinjre me 50 Bandaria or 1 Bandar chhoda gya, Or Elaan hua k jo 1 minute me Bandar ko pehchan kr Pakad lega use $10,000 milenge

1st - Obama gya Par fail ho gya..

2nd - George bush gya lekin wo bi nakaam rha

3rd - Manmohan singh gya or 10 second me Bandar le aaya..

Sab ne hairani bhari nazron se manmohan se pucha aap ne kaise pata kra?

Manmohan: Mai pinjre me gya or kaha ki

"VOTE CONGRESS KO HI DENA" to sirf ek ne kaha-

"LAUDA LE LE MERA"

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Balika vadhu" special

Anandi:
Dadi sa, suhagrat k pehle niche k bal katne padte h kya?

Dadisa:
Pata nai chhori
Mhare to shadi k 4 sal bad bal aaye the.
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Rajnikant ne Vidya Balan Ko cycle pe aage bithaya
Vidya-Rajni mujhe dekh Ke Apka khada nhi hota?
Rajnknt-Pagli Ye Ladies cycle Hai.Pata Hai tu kis Pe baiti hai???:

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Pehele Honeymoon Aur Dusre Honeymoon mein kya Farak hai?

Pehle Honeymoon mein Biwi bolti hai, "OH MY GOD, HOW BIG IT IS" !:O;

Dusre mein ye baat Pati bolta hai

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Pehla Bacha: “Meri Mummy
Jadu Karna Jaanti Hai Jab Wo
Papa Ke Lund Ko Pakadti
Hai To Lund Bahut Bada Ho
Jata Hai “.

Doosra Bacha Bola: “Ye Kaun
Si Badi Baat Hain Meri
Mummy Jab Mere Dad Ke
Lund Per Bethti Hai Toh Sara
Lund Gayab Ho Jata Hai.

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Pappu: You know a single sperm has 37.5 MB of DNA information in it. That means that a normal ejaculation of about 6 million sperm represents a data transfer of 1,587.5 TB in about 3 seconds.

Bunty: Amazing.

Pappu: Yep. And you thought nothing was faster than Google. I am really proud to be a boy. Great talent and great energy!
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Once A couple went 2 a restaurant..
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BF:" Kya logi tum ??
GF:" Tum jo kaho..
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BF:" Achcha waiter zara Menu lana
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GF:" (nazre jhuka ke) Mai bhi menu
khaungi... :p :O

Aur Patao Gawaro Ko..

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A married Man died before SEX.His Wife cut his Penis, filled it withcement & fixed in wall.Every night she went to wall & satisfied herself.One day her neighbor saw n made a hole in wall n removed it & put His own Penis in the wall & waited for his turn.Lady came with knife,Cut Penis & said:'DARLING WE ARE SHIFTING TO OUR NEW HOUSE."

MORAL HER JAGA LULLY NAHI PHASANI CHAHIEY
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Chalti bus me jagah na milne par ek bacchi ko baba ji ne goud me bitha liya.

Kuch der baad ladki khadi hui

aur gusse se boli.
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Baba ji Ya is lund ko bitha lo ya mujhe.

Kash Tum BAKRI Hote Hum Tume Ghash Khilate Or Pyar Se Puchte
SMS Bhejne Mai Kanjus Kaun? Tum Ya Mai Or Tum Pyar Se Bolte-Mai Mai Main
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Friends R Like Biscuits....
U R Parle & I M G
U R Marie & I M Gold
U R Sun & I M Feast
U R Milk & I M Shakti
U R Krack & I M Jack

U R 99% Lovely
U R 88% Naughty
U R 77% Beautiful
U R 87% Sweet
U R 69% Quite So U R Totally 99+88+77+87+69=420
So U R 420 Numbari
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Teri Duniya Mai Koi Gam Naho Teri Khusiya Kabhi Kam Naho Bhagwan Tumhe Aesi Item (G.F) Dede Jo Dabang Ki Muni Or Shila Ki Jawani Se Kam Naho
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Just After Marriage Husband Saved Wife Number As MERE CHARNO KI DASI & After 5 Years Husband Renamed Wife Name As MERE PRANO KI PYASHI
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School Mai Teacher Ne Bacho Se Pucha Hum Mar Gaye Ye Bahuvachan Hai Agar Mai Kahu Mai Mar Gayato Kya Hoga? Bache-G Ek Dinki Chuti Hogi
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Why do boys go to temple? B'cause temple is the only
place where u can find pooja bhavana shradha aarti
archana aradhana shanti Jyoti priti & finaly Trupti
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Thappad marne pe naraj patni ko pati bola,"adami use
marta he jise pyar karta he." Patni ne pati ko 2 mare
or boli "aap kya samjte he k me apse pyar nahi karti.
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Munabhai-Ye sali govt drinking nd driving sath2 Q nahi
karne deti? Circuit-Simple hE bhai.Bhai wo speed breakar
aane par gilas gir sakta he.
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Man: Sir, my wife is missing. Postmaster:Ye Post office hai,
Police station me complaint dijiye Man: KHUSHI ke maare
mein kya karu, kuch samajh mei nahi aata!!
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Munna bhai. A cercuit MURGA & MURGI me diffrence kaise
samajhne ka? Cercuit. Simple hai bhai,Ek patthar marne ka
BHAGA to MURGA or BHAGI to MURGI...
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Wife:Chalo na kahin chalte hai,ghumne car me aur car me
drive karungi. Husband:Yadi tum car drive karogi to jayenge
car me,ayenge akhbaar me
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Ganguli's son : Are dekho maa. Papa sixer pe sixer mare ja
rahe hain. Gangulis wife : Beta ye ADVERTISEMENT hai !!! .....:-)   
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Ravan ko court me le gae bola Gita par hanth rakho RAVEN -
Nahi Sita par hanth rakhkar itni musibat aai ab Gita par hant nahi rakhunga.
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HRITHIK:Aaj Mere pass 14Car hai,8 Bikes hai,4 Bunglow hai,
Farm house hai..... Tumhare pass kya hai? ABHISHEK:Mere
baap ke sir pe bal hai!
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Girl:Is dress ka kya price hai?Shopkeeper:Sirf 5 kiss.Girl:Aur
us dress ka?Shopkeeper:10 kiss.Girl:Dono dress pack kar
do,bill dadi dengi.
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Bhikhari : Sahab 1 Rupaye de do!!! Sahab : kal Ana..
Bhikhari : Sara is kal kal ke chakkar mein to is basti me
mera Lakho Rupaye fase hai!!






some exclusive latest hindi non veg jokes collection. jokes love suresh present this jokes. you can send this jokes free from any one one. all the the hindi jokes are collected from top rated. so friend enjoy the jokes.

  • Jokes 01
Ek Ladki Aur Ladke Ka Bahut Long Time Affair Chalne Ke Baad Breakup Ho Raha Tha....

Ladke Ne Ladki Ko Diye Hue Gift Ginate Hue Bola....

Ladka: "Ab Humare Bich Kuch bhi Nahi Raha Meri Nishaniya Mujhe Wapas kar Do"

Ladki Bhi Tez Thi Usne Condom Se Bhari Ek Tokri Ladke Ko Pakdayi Aur Boli

Ladki: "Le, Ismein Se Jo Tera Hai Dhund Le"



  • Jokes 02
बंता: यार संता क्या इस धरती पर कोई ऐसा इंसान है जिसे परेशानी ना हो?

संता: नहीं तो।

बंता: तो यार अगर किसी की ज़िन्दगी में कोई परेशानी हो तो किसके पास जाना चाहिए?

संता: किसान के पास।

बंता: किसान के पास! वो क्यों?

संता: क्योंकि उसके पास हल होता है।



  • Jokes 03
Hole in the Umbrella
Ek sardar ki chatri me hole tha
kisine pucha,umbrella me hole kyu?
2nd sardar: agar koi bomb raste me phat

gia to?
Sardar bola,Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata

kaise chalega



  • Jokes 04
Ek baar 3 chor Pappu, Badde aur Chotte police se chup ke 3 boriyon me ghus gaye!
Police wala aya, usne pehli bori mein laat mari!
Pappu bola: BHOW-BHOW!
Police waala: kutta hai
Dusri bori mein laat mari!
Badde bola: Meooowwww
Police wala: Billi hai
Teesri bori mein laat mari
koi awaaz nai ayi!
Fir mari, koi awaz nai!
20-25 laat maari to andar se Chotte chillaya!
Abe Saale, AALU hu!



  • Jokes 05
Pati aur Patni Sexx Kar Rahe The...
Achanak kisi ne Door Bell Bajayi.
Pati ne 5 Min baad Darwaza Khola...
Uska dost aaya hua tha...
Dost - Yaar badi der laga di darwaza kholne main?
Pati - yar Hum log chatni koot rahe the.
Shararti Dost bola - Bhabhi hame bhi Chatni chatao...
Hosiyar Bhabhi - Maine To Bartan Dho Diye Hain, Kootne ke Dande Par Lagi Hogi, Chat Lo.



  • Jokes 06
 5 Year old son was crying....
Dad came and asked.
Dad - Why are you crying? Tell me I am your friend na...
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Son - Are Kuch nahi yaar. Zara sa horlicks kya nai piya, teri ITEM bhadak gayi....

Jokes 01
 Bachhe ki DadaGiri

Ek bachha bhagwan se CYCLE ke liye pray karta hai...
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But bhagwan usko Cycle nahi deta hai
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Agle din bachha bhagwan Ganesh ki Tasveer Chura leta hai aur Lord Shiva ko Latter likhta hai...
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"Agar baccha chahiye to cycle lekar Mandir aaja.."

  • Jokes 07
 Ek Cute se bachhe ko dekh kar Ek Ladki ne uske Gaal par KISS kar diya
Ladki : I am Sorry, Apke Gaal par Lipstik Lag gayi
Bachaa : It's OK baby, "Kuch achha karne se agar DAAG lagte hain to DAAG achhe hain"

Jokes 01
 Fasi Ki Khushi se
Police:Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phasi di

jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Sardar(Khusi se) : Main to uthta hi subha 9

baje hon!!!

  • Jokes 08
 Aadmi apni Biwi ke saath Bar mein baitha tha.
Waha se ek callgirl nikli aur boli:
kam paise doge to aisa hi maal milega.

  • Jokes 09
 Vakil - jaj Sahab, Kanun ki kitab ke page no 15 ke mutabik mere muvakkil ko Bari kiya jae
Jaj - Kitab Pesh ki jae
Kitab pesh ki gayi, Jaj nepage no. 15 khola to usme 1000 ke 10 Note the,
Jaj muskrate hue bola - bahut khub is tarh ke 2 sabut aur pesh kiye jae...

Jokes 01
 BF txt to his GF on watsApp...
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BF : Hi
.
GF : Hello
.
BF : Kahan par ho?
.
GF : Main apne papa ki BMW me club ja rhi hu,
abhi driver mujhe club chor dega,
uske baad mall me shopping k liye jaungi,
tab
tumhe call krti hu,
Tum kahan par ho ?
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BF : 401 no ki bus me,
TUMHARI SEAT K PICHE,
TUM TICKET MAT LENA MaiNE LE LI HAI..

Jokes 01
 Garmi Ki Wajah Se Master Ka Dil Padhane Ka Nahi Kar Raha Tha
To wo Baccho Se Idhar Udhar Ke Sawal Puch Ke Time Paas Karne Lag Gaya...
Pappu Ki Bari Aayi To Usne Pucha.
Master - Agar Tum Ek Jungle Mein Ho Aur Wahan par Sher Aa Jaye To Tum Kya Karoge?
Pappu - Ji Simple, Mein Ped Per Chadd Jaunga
Master - Han, Agar vo Sher Bhi Ped Per Chadd Jaye To?
Pappu - To Main Pani Mein Kood Jaunga...
Master - Aur Agar Wo Sher Bhi Pani Main Aa Jaye To?
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Pappu Ne Muskurate Hue Master Se Puchha - "Master Ji, Sher Ko Apni Behan Di Hui Hai Kya Jo Usi Ki Side Liye Ja Rahe Ho"

  • Jokes10
 Jor Se Bolo
Teacher to class: A for?
Class: Apple
Teacher: Jor Se Bolo
Class: Jai Mata Di!

  • Jokes 11
Garmi Ki Wajah Se Master Ka Dil Padhane Ka Nahi Kar Raha Tha
To wo Baccho Se Idhar Udhar Ke Sawal Puch Ke Time Paas Karne Lag Gaya...
Pappu Ki Bari Aayi To Usne Pucha.
Master - Agar Tum Ek Jungle Mein Ho Aur Wahan par Sher Aa Jaye To Tum Kya Karoge?
Pappu - Ji Simple, Mein Ped Per Chadd Jaunga
Master - Han, Agar vo Sher Bhi Ped Per Chadd Jaye To?
Pappu - To Main Pani Mein Kood Jaunga...
Master - Aur Agar Wo Sher Bhi Pani Main Aa Jaye To?
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Pappu Ne Muskurate Hue Master Se Puchha - "Master Ji, Sher Ko Apni Behan Di Hui Hai Kya Jo Usi Ki Side Liye Ja Rahe Ho"

  • Jokes 12

SCIENCE kahta hai ki paani ubalne se uske kitanu mar jate hai..
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Par Science ko ye nahi pata ki kitanu ke marne ke baad unki
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'Dead Bodies' to Paani main hi reh jati hai..
-
Stupid Science











 Ek Jungle Me Sher Sherni Romance Kar Rahe The
To Sherni Ne Usse Roka Aur Aaju Baju Dekhane Lagi
To Sherne Pocha : Kyu Kya Huva Janu
Sherni : Dekh Rahi Hu Kahi Discovery Wale To Nahi Hai Na
Wo Sale MMS Bana Lete Hai !!!

 Boyfriend and Girlfriend room main khamosh
baithe they*
Gf ki soch :
1- Kyun ye mujhse baat ni kar raha?
2- Kya ye dusri ladki k barey me soch raha
hai?
3- Kya ye kisi or ko chahta hai?
4- Kya isne mere chehre pe wrinkles dekhe
hain?
5- Kya mai MOTI ho gai hun!.
.
.
.
Bf ki soch : Yar saala Petrol Kitna Mehanga Ho
Gaya hai !!!



Ek Car ki Nilami ho rahi thi,
10 lac
20 lac
30 lac
Ek Aadmi ne Car ki khrab halat pe gor kiya to pas khare Aadmi se pucha :-
.
.
Is Car me esi kon si khoobi hai k iske itna daam lag rahe hai?
.
.
Aadmi :- Ab tak is Car k 10 hadse hue hai or har haadse me sirf or sirf "Biwi" ki hi Maut hui hai.
-
-
Aadmi :- 40 lakh











Non Veg Jokes Collection - Most Funny Jokes



some hindi non veg jokes collection


hindi non veg number- 01

I am Looking for a Bank
which can perform Two things for me.
Give me a Loan,
and
then Leave me Alone….




hindi non veg number- 02

Santa giving exam while standing at the door.

A man asked “Why are you standing at the door?”

Santa: “Idiot, I am giving entrance test.”

hindi non veg number- 04

I Saw It With My Eyes But Couldn’t Understand It
Took It In My Hands, But Couldn’t Understand It
Keep Thinking For A Long Time, But Again Couldn’t Understand It
It was Not A Dream,
It was Is Not A Love,
It was Not Even Friendship,
Then I Realized: “It Was Question Paper”

hindi non veg number- 05

When There Is a Long Gap Between Engagement & Marriage,
Who Is Most Benefited ?
?
Boy
No
?
Girl
No
?
It's The
.
.
.
Mobile Company!
most popular hindi non veg jokes collection, here you can find hindi adult jokes.

hindi non veg number- 06

Question by a student !!
If a single teacher can’t
teach us all the subjects,
Then…
How could you expect a single student
to learn all subjects ?

hindi non veg number- 07

A Girl Takes 100 Pics In A
Day and Deletes 99pictures.
One Picture
That Seems Better.
She Uploads and
Comments ? Aaise Hi
Bethi Thi Yar Kisi Ne Click Kar Li?

hindi non veg number- 08

Height of flirting of
ENGINEERS
.
.
Teachr: Where is your Asignmnt
book?
.
.
Stdnt:Mam, I lost it While
fighting with
students who said dat you are not the
most
beautiful
teacher in this college.

hindi non veg number- 09

Love Affair in school:
GIRL'S WAYS:
A girl sitting on THE 1st bench turns her back &
Sees THE boy Sitting on THE last bench & says- "Thank God !!!
Stupid Aaya Hai!"
.
BOY'S WAYS:
Before the boy could see his girl entering in the class
all his friends start shouting
"ABEY TERI WAALI AA GAYI".

hindi non veg number- 10

Modern...
Obedient..
Neat...
Kind...
Excellent..
Young.
Thats ME.
Dont feel sad... your name is also there...
read the 1st letter of every word.

hindi non veg number- 11

Exams are like Girl friends
- Too many questions
- Difficult to understand
- More explanation is needed
- Result is always fail!

hindi non veg number- 12

Santa Doodh Wale Ki Dukaan Pe Jata Hai,
Aur Kehta Hai.

Santa: Tumhari Shop Ka Doodh Kharab Hai,
Sharbat Mein Dala Phatt Gya
Doodh Wale Ne Hairani Se Poocha:
Konse Sharbat Mein Dala Tha?
Santa: Niimboo Pani Mein

hindi non veg number- 13

Ek Baar Santa Circus Dekhne Jata Hai.

Toh Circus Mein Ladki Ne Sher Ko Kiss Kiya.
Ring Mastar: Aap Mein Se Koi Yeh Kaam Kar Sakta Hai?
Santa: Main Aata Hoon Na,
Par Pehle Iss Sher Ko Peeche Karo.

hindi non veg number- 14

Ek Baar Santa Apni Biwi Ke Saath Jaa Raha Tha,
Raste Mein Usse Ek Dost Mila
Jisse Police Ne Pakda Hua Tha.

Santa Ne Usse Puchha: Kya Hua?
Dost: Mene Apni Biwi Ko Maar Dala
Santa Kuch Sochte Huye: Saza Kya Mili Hai?
Dost: 6 Hafte
Santa: Bass Yaar, 6 Hafte
Santa Ne Aav Dekha Na Taav Fatafatt
Police Ki Gun Lee Or Apni Biwi Ko Maar Dala
Dost Rote Hue: Abe Sale,
Yeh Tune Kya Kiya?
Puri Baat To Sunta,
6 Hafte Baad Muje Phaansi Ha.

hindi non veg number- 15

Santa Banta Ko Gusse Se Bol Raha Tha.

Santa: Yaar, Jab Mene Tujhe Khat Likha Tha Ki
Meri Shaadi Par Jaroor Aana,
Tum Aaye Kyun Nahi?
Banta: Ohh Yaar,
Par Mujhe Koi Khat Mila Hi Nahi.
Santa: Mene Likha To Tha Ki
Khat Mile Ya Na Mile Tum Zaroor Aana.

hindi non veg number- 16

Heart Attack Wali Beizzati :P

Girl To Boy: Jannu Koi Aisi Bat Kaho,
Jismei Dukh B Ho Or Khushi B.
.
.
.
.
.
Boy: You R So Beautiful Aunty Ji.

hindi non veg number- 17

Kya Zamana Aa Gaya Hai Dosto.
.
.
Student 1 Ladki Ko Ghaseet Ke
School Le Jaa Rahe The.
.
.
1 Buzurg Bole:
Isko Chhod Do Ye Khud School Chali Jayegi
.
.
.
Student: Baba Ji Ye Hamari Madam Hai
Roz School Se Date Par Bhag Jaati Hai!

hindi non veg number- 18

Santa Biology Padhte Hue 1 Sawal Aaya.
Badal Kale Kyu Hote Hai.
Banta - Kuch Der Sochte Hu.
Are Pagal Agar Badal Roj Dhup Me,
Khule Ghumenge To Wo Kale Hi Ho Jayenge.

hindi non veg number- 19

Mainu Yaar-yaar Karde Rahe,,,,,

Es Yaar Ne Sanu Rula Dita,......

Hora Ton Ki Umida Si,jad Yaar Ne Hi Bhula Dita,,,,

Mudke Dosti Nahi Karni Main,menu Yaar Ne Sayana Bana Dita.

hindi non veg number- 20

Ae Dil kisi di yaad che Rona hai Fizul,

Ae Dil kisi di yaad che Rona hai Fizul,

Ae ansoon bade ne Anmol inna nu khona hai Fizul.

Royin unna layi jo tere te Fida hon,

Unna layi ki Rona jinaa de Ashique hazaar hon.

hindi non veg number- 21

Log

Mitran di pur zor farmysh te ek waari fer

Na zuban se

Na fone se

DIRECT

DIL SE

Nara awam da

Zardari bekaar da

Te jerra is msg nu roke o v odhe naal

da.






hindi non veg number- 22
Santa: Dr.saab tusi ta kende c

svere game khedn nal sehat thik rehndi hai

per mainu ta koi farq ni paya?

Dctr: Tusi keri game khedi c?

Snta: Mobile te sap wali

hindi non veg number- 23

Oh Menu KeHndi Teri ZinDagI Nu Mai JannatBna Dau.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Bnauni Kamli nu aje chaa V Ni AunDi.
.
.
.
ConfiDeNce Ta DekHo. ajj kall dia kudian da..

hindi non veg number- 24

Ques: Agar duniya mai bejli nahi hoti toh TV kaise dekhte?
.
.
.
.
Pathan: Mom-batti jala ke !

hindi non veg number- 25

A Couple Before Marriage
'MAD' For Each Other …
After Marriage
'MADE' For Each Other …
And
A Few Years Later
'MAD' Because Of Each Other…

hindi non veg number- 26

Love aur arrange marrige me kia farq hai?
Simple
Love marrige me ap apni girl friend se shadi krte hen..
Aur
Arange marrige me ksi or ki girlfriend se:)

hindi non veg number- 27

Why do couples hold hands
during their wedding day?.?.?.?
It is just a formality,
like two boxers shaking hands b4
the fight begins…



Friend If you Like This Jokes Then Please Give A Comment......


Wahi khamoshi wahi tanhai

Wahi khamoshi wahi tanhai,
ye hawa apne saath kiski yaad laayi,
hum to chand ko dekh rahe the,
phir na jane kiske liye aankhein bhar aayi.

ye swetar apk liye hai

Ye swetar apk liye hai
/”"‘\/”‘”‘\
/ /!D!!SR\ \
\ \! !! / /
\_) !! (_/
!…!!…..!
Pehen lena,ab thand aa gai h.
Happy thandii..

Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti

LECTURER: Write a note on Gandhi Jayanti.
CIRCUIT WRITES: Gandhi was a great man,
but maa kasam i dont know who is Jayanti.
Koi locha-lafda hoga buddhe ka!

Waqt se lad kar jo apna naseeb badal de

Waqt se lad kar jo apna naseeb badal de,
insaan wahi jo apni taqdeer badal de.
kal kya hoga kabhi na socho,
kya pata kal waqt khud apni lakeer badal de.

Hila zor se hila

Hila zor se hila
hila pura hila
dil se hila
sabke samne hila
jitna hilaogay utna
maza ayega
warana halwa jal jayega:P

Bina dant wala kutta katay to ?

MUNNA BHAI: circuit agar bina daant wala kutta kate to kya karne ka re?
CIRCUIT:simple he bhai, bina sui wala injection lene ka!!!
ha ha ha

The best medicine for human is LOVE & CARE

The best medicine for human is LOVE & CARE.
Someone asked: What if it doesn’t work?
He smiled and said:
Increase the dose! :D

thora sa karne do

thora sa karne do
Plz thora sa karne do
kisi ko pati nahi chale ga
bus thora sa karne do
aik chota sa sms



 







Birbal Ki Akalmandi

Akabar Aur Birbal Ke Kisse Bahut Famous Hai
Hamesha Akbar Birbal Se Kuch Esa Puchta Tha Jo Hatt Ke Ho
Ek Din Akbar Ko Ek Shararat Sooji Aur Birbal Se Bola.
Akbar: “Wada Kar Birbal Teri Biwi Ki Pehli Bar Chut Tu Mujhe Lene Dega”
Birbal: “Wada Hujoor, Par Meri Bhi Ek Sharat Hai”
Akbar: “Bol?”
Birbal: “Shaadi Aapki Behan Se Karoonga“

Sale Kamine Log

Ek Bar Jai Ne Rote Hue Apne Dost Niraj Ko Bataya
Jai: “Yaar, Bus Mein Mera Kisi Ne Purse Chori Kar Liya”
Niraj Hairan Hote Hue: “Abe, Tune Purse Rakha Kaha Tha?”
Jai: “Pant Ki Piche Wali Jeb Mein”
Niraj: “To Tujhe Pata Nahi Laga Kya?”
Jai Rote Hue: “Ab Mujhe Kya Pata Tha Ki Vo Purse Bhi Nikal Lega“

Bill Kaise Pay Kare

Cabel Wala Flat Ki Ghanti Bajata Hai, Toh Andar Se Aunti Awaaz Lagati Hai.
Aunti: “Koun?”
Cabel Wala: “Aunty, Iss Mahine Ka Cabel Ka Bill De Do”
Aunti: “Baad Mein Aana Aah Aah Aa Aaaahnaa, Abhi Doodh Wale Ka Chuka Rahi Hoon“

Ladkiyo Ke Kapdo Ki Fitting

Ek Ladki Tailor Ke Paas Suit Silvane Jaati Hai. Tailor Ladki Ka Naap Lete Hue Bolta Hai.
Tailor (Fitting Ka Naap Lete Hue):- “Koi Boyfriend Hai?”
Girl:- “Haan, Kyon?”
Tailor:- “Use Bolna Thode Din Left Side Pe Jyada Dhyaan De, Fitting Sahi Baithegi“

Daulat Ki Koi Kimat Nahi Tharak Ke Aage

Salim Aur Anarkali Ke Pyar Ka Kissa Bada Mashoor Hai, Ek Bar Dono Apas Mein Bat Kar Rahe The.
Salim: “Jaaneman Tere Kadmo Mein Rakh Dunga Saara Khazana”
Anarkali Ko Sex Ki Iccha Sata Rahi Thi, Sunke Boli.
Anarkali: “Maa Chudane Gaya Tera Khazana, Andar Daal Aur Chal Shuru Kar Dabaana.“

Hay Re In Taxes Ne Maar Diya

Pranav Mukharji (Finance Minister) Ne Ek Bar Callgirl Se Pucha.
Mukharji: “Kitna Leti Ho?”
Callgirl: “Aage Ka 200 Aur Peche Ka 220”
Mukharji Hairani Se: “Areey Piche Ka 220 Kyu?”
Callgirl: “10% Turnover Tax“

Samaan Apna Apna

Pati – Patni Talaq Ke Baad Apna-Apna Samaan Alag Kar Rahe The.
Pati (Bra Dete Hue): “Yeh Lo Apne Doodh Ka Dakkan”
Patni (Underwear Dete Hue): “Yeh Lo Murde Ka Kafan“

Hathon Ke Bhoot Honto Se Nahi Mante

Suhagrat Ko Pati Ka Khada Nahi Ho Raha Tha,
Patni Ne Usko Muh Mein Le Liya Aur Koshish Ki Par Fir Bhi Baat Nahi Bani.
Husband Ko Ye Dekhar Gusa Aaya Aur Bola: “Durr Hatt Ja, Haatho Ke Bhoot Honto Se Nahi Maante“

Ooi Maa, Ab Bahar Bhi Nikal Lo Na

Ladke Ne Sex Start Kiya To Ladki Bolti Hai.
Ladki: “Jaanu, Bohat Dard Ho Raha Hai”
Ladka: “Koi Baat Nahi Thodi Der Mein Nahi Hoga”
Ladki: “Nahi Jaanu Bohat Ho Raha Hai Nikal Lo Na”
Ladka: “Tum Bas 10 Tak Gino, Main Nikal Lunga.”
Ladki: “1-2-Aa-3-4-5-Uff-6-7-8-Aah-Aa-9-9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-2 Or 2 Or 2, Or Do”

IPL Ke Male Lo I-Pill Ke Sath

Six And Sex:
Utha Ke Maro To Six,
Lita Ke Maro To Sex,
Bahar Gaya To Six,
Andar Gaya To Sex,
Dono Haath Upar To Six,
Dono Per Upar To Sex
Enjoy IPL With I-Pill..

Ladkiyo Ko Suzav

Baba Saxidas Ji Ka Kahna Hai Ki Ladkiyo Ko Apni Shave Regular Karte Rahna Chahiye
Ab Aap Ladkiya Soch Rahi Hongi Ki Kyu?
Isliye Ki Agar Baal Jyada Badd Jayenge To Unmein Jue Pad Sakti Hai
Ab Agar Jue Padengi To Unka Dil Udhar Khujli Karne Ka Bhi Karega
Khujli To Hath Se Karni Padegi, Aur Jab Udhar Hath Lagega To Maja Bhi Aayega
Aur Jab Maja Aayega To Fir Aur Maja Lene Ka Dil Karega.
Hath Se Jab Dil Bhar Jayega To Fir Koi Boy Friend Banane Ka Dil Karega.
Aur Aage To Aap Ladkiya Sayani Hi Ho.
Isliye Agar Pyaar Vyaar Ke Chakkar Se Bachna Hai To Regular Shave Karti Raha Karo.
Note: Jin Jin Ladkiyo Ne Taazi Shave Kari Hai, Vo Ek Bar Mujhe Check Karne Ka Moka De, Taki Main Bata Saku Ki Sahi Se Ki Hai Ya Nahi---

Do Dost

"Do Bahut Hi Sachhe Dosto Ki Kahani, Jo Ye Sabit Karti Hai Ki.. Dost Ho To Aise, Nahi To Na Ho"
Golu & Molu Bahut Achhe Dost The Par Achanak Ek Hi Din Dono Mar Jate Hai Aur Ikathe Narak Mein Pahunchte Hai.
Golu Ne Molu Ko Dekha Aur Hairan Hote Hue Pucha.
Golu: “Abe Tu Kaise Mara?”
Molu: “Thand Se, Aur Tu?”
Golu: “Mene Aatam Hatya Ki”
Molu: “Kyu Be, Tu To Achha Bhala Tha Aur Khusi Se Jee Raha Tha?”
Golu: “Yaar, Mujhe Laga Meri Biwi Ka Kisi Se Affair Hai, Ek Din Shaq Hone Pe Chaapa Maara Par Koi Nahi Tha, Sharm Ke Mare Maine Aatm-Hatya Kar Li”
Molu Ne Golu Ko Zor Se Thapad Mara Aur Bola.
Molu: “Bhonsdi Ke Agar Fridge Khol Ke Dekha Hota, To Na Tu Sharm Se Marta Aur Na Mein Thand Se“

Aap Bhi Apni Problem Baba Ji Ko Bataye

Rakshi Sawant Ne Ek Bar Socha Ki Vo Bhi Kisi Pandit Ya Jyotish Ke Pas Jakar Apni Kismat Check Karvaye.
To Ja Pahunchi Baba Saxidas Ke Pass Aur Boli.
Rakhi Sawant: “Baba Ji, Kya Mere Hath Mein Dhan Ki Rekha Hai?”
Ab Apne Baba Saxidas Bhi Muh pe Baat Kah Dete Hai, Muskuraye Aur Bole
Baba Ji: “Bachha Haath Mein To Pata Nahi, Par Tumhari Salwar Mein To Jarur Hai“

Chhiiiiiiiiii Kitna Ganda Joke Hai

Hospital Mein Dekha Gaya Ek Scene.
Doctor Marij Ki Gaand Mein Ungli Karke Betha Tha.
Ek Aadmi Ne Ye Dekha Aur Us Se Raha Nahi Gaya Aur Usne Akhir Doctor Se Puch Hi Liya.
Aadmi: “Dr Saab, Ye Kya Kar Rahe Ho?”
Doctor: “Mareej Ko Ulti Kara Raha Hu”
Aadmi Ne Hairan Hoke Pucha: “Par Aise Kaise ?”
Doctor: “Dekhta Ja, Abhi Ye Ungli Iske Muh Mein Dalunga Na, To Karega Na“

Har Koi Ek Jaisa Nahi Hota

Ek Baar Pati Or Uski Patni Decide Karte Hain Ki Sex Karne Ke Baad Gullak Mein Paise Dalenge.
After A Month. Pati Patni Gullak Kholte Hai.
Pati: “Maine 10/- Ke Note Dale The, Yeh 500/-, 100/-, 50/- Ke Kahaan Se Aaye?”
Patni: “Har Koi Tumhari Tarah Kanjoos Thodi Hi Hota Hai“

Budhapa Pension

"Budhapa Pension Leke Pati Khushi Khushi Ghar Aya. Par Patni Ne Kuch Esa Bol Ke Uska Sara Mood Hi Kharab Kar Diya."
Pati Khushi Khushi Ghar Aya Aur Biwi Ko Awaj Dekar Bola.
Pati: “Arey Rahul Ki Maa Sunti Ho, Mujhe Seene Ke Safed Baal Dikhane Pe Bhudapa Pension Mili Hai”
Biwi: “Pant Ki Zip Khol Ke Dikha Dete To Viklaang Bhatta Bhi Mil Jaata“

Hawas Ke Pujari

Jaruri Nahi Ki Sirf Insaan Hi Sex Ke Deewane Ho, Jaanwar Bhi Sex Ko Pasand Karte Thai
Isi Tarha Jungle Mein Ek Din Gadhe Ko Tharak Chadi Hui Thi, Himmat Karke Vo Sherni Ke Pass Gaya Aur Usko Bola.
Gadha: “I Love You, Darling”
Sherni Ne Ye Suna Aur Guse Se Boli.
Sherni: “Chal Chal, Apni Shakal Dekhi Hai Tune, Nikal Idhar Se”
Gadha: “Abe Shakal Ko Maar Goli Niche Dekh”
Sherni: “Ohhh, I Love You Too Janu“

Divorced But Still Virgin

On The Wedding Night.
Wife: “Hey Be Gentle Please .. Its My First Time On Bed”
Husband Shocked: “What? But You Have Been Divorced Three Times”
Wife: “Yes”
My 1st Husband Was A “Philosopher” He Only Talked About It.
2nd Was “Gynecologist” He Just Kept Looking At It.
3rd Was “Engineer” He Needed A Year To Design A New Way To Do It.
And You Are A “Politician” So This Time I Know I Am Going To Be “Fu-Ked” Like The Whole Country.

A Man With His Tool In A Woman’s Mouth

A Great Thinker Once Said:
A Man With His Tool In A Woman’s Mouth ….
Can Be A Dentist.
Shame On Your Dirty Thinking.

Insulting SMS For Your Friend

Ek Ladka Ladki Ke Sath Sex Kar Raha Tha,
Ladki Achanak Zor Se Hansi,
Ladka: “Kya Hua Jaan?”
Ladki: “Jaanu Tumhara To Ek Hi Tatta Hai”
Ladka: “Nahi Jaan Dusra Abhi SMS Padh Raha Hai“

Girlfriend Ke Saath Kya Kar Raha Tha

Ladka Apni Girlfriend Ke Saath,
Kamre Ke Andhar,
Table Ke Upar,
Pankhe Ke Neeche,
De Tacatac… Tacatac…
De Tacatac… Tacatac…
Salo Tennis Khel Raha Tha, Jaruri Nahi Har Jagha Sex Hi Kare.

Apne To Apne Hote Hai

Jhuke Lund Ke Bhi Sapne Hote Hai,
Chut Milne Ke Bhi Nagme Hote Hai,
Agar Khada Na Ho Apka Kabhi Chodne Mein,
To Hamein Yaad Karna Kyun Ki Apne To Apne Hote Hai.

King Or Queen

A Newly Married Man Was Standing In Front Of A Mirror Naked.
And Was Admiring His Physique. “Two Inches More & I Will Be A King”
Suddenly The Wife Comes In And Says,“Two Inches Less & You Will Be A Queen“

Vakiye Hi Samp Bhi Mar Gaya Aur Lathi Bhi Na Tooti

Saanp Bhi Mar Jaye Aur Laathi Bhi Na Toote Isko Ek Shabd Mein Samjhao?
.
“MUTTH

Difference Between Foreigner And Indian After Whiskey

Whats The Difference Between Foreigner And Indian After Two Pegs Of Whiskey?
Foreigner Says: “Good Night Sweet Dreams”
Indian Says: “Bhai Ab Batao Kiski Maan Chodni Hai“

Aisa Q ?

Question Of The Year.
Jab Mohobbat Or Jung Mein Sab Jayaz Hai,
To Mohobbat Mein Hone Wale Chunnu Munnu Na-Jayaz Kyun?

Warning On A T-Shirt Of A Girl

Written On The T-Shirt Of A Girl:
“Statutory Warning: Objects Inside The T-Shirt Are Larger Than They Appear From Outside“

Beware Of Doctors

A Lady Died Of Aids Because Her Doctor Made A Mistake In Prescription.
He Wrote, Make Frequent Changes In ‘Males‘ Instead Of ‘Meals‘ Beware Of Doctors

Definition Of A Lesbian?

Question: “What Is The Definition Of A Lesbian?”
Answer: “Just Another Damn Woman Trying To Do A Man’s Job“

Yaad To Aayegi Hi

Suhag Raat Ko Pati Ne Patni Ki Taange Uthai, To Patni Rone Lagi
Pati: “Kya Hua?”
Patni: “Kuch Nahi Hamra Padosi Deepak Yaad Aagya, Uska Bhi Yehi Style Tha“










1. Aik train main daku ghuss aaye or pporee train ko loot lya, Beti:
daddy main nay apne ring save kar le or usay apne pussy main dal
dya, Daddy: Good .. Agar ye apne ammi ko bata datein to humara
SuitCase bhe bach jata......

2. Tention hai to charas loe,
dimag kamzoor hai to badam ka juice loe,
khoon ke kami hai to Anaar ka juice loe,
Mardaza kamzori hai to.. to .. to.. No Problem .. Mera Lund Choos
Loe..


3. Girl: I m like a radio, my left nipple is volume, my right nipple
id tuner,.. Boy turns both but there is no sound. Girl Said, Stupid
neechay Cell(batery) tera baap dalay ga.

4. Question: Why do most men prefer to kiss a woman's lips?
Answer: That's the best way to shut a woman's Horizontal mouth &
open the Vertical one...!

5.Once a boy came late to class.. Teacher said to him: tumhien
periods k miss honay ka zara bhe ehsas hai ? Boy Said: jee.. bohott
ehsas hai .. tub say jub say mere sister k periods aana ruk gaye
thay .. ammi bayhosh hoe gain thin abbu ko heart-attack hoe gaya tha
or mazay ke baat ye k humara driver bhe bhag gaya .... ;)

6. Larka Larki say: tum gana bohot acha gatey hoee ..
Larki: nahe yaar main to sirf bathroom singer hon,
Boy: acha... to kisi din bulao na dono mil k Mehfil jamatay hain ..

7. A Girl Sitting in Examination hall with Sardar je..
Girl: main aap ke naqal mar loon?
Sardar: Aahooo.. tu mere naqal mar lay phir main tere Asal maroon ga ...

8. Aankhein dewangi main laga baithay...
Dil Aashiqui main hara bethay....
Aap to award yafta GANDU Niklay...
KHUHRAY say bhe Gand Marwa Bethay...

9.Ek aurat apne padosi k sath sex kar rahi thi,
k tbhi uska pati aa gaya aur padosi ko pitne laga,
Patni boli: maro aur maro prai aurat pe hath dalta hai,
itne me padosi uske pati ko pitne laga,
Patni fir boli: maro aur maro ''NA KARTA HAI NA KARNE DETA HAI".


10. WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PERSON WHO IS COMITTING
SUICIDE AND A VIRGIN ? _ _ _ _ONE IS TRYING TO DIE. .......
THE OTHER ONE IS DYING TO TRY.....


11. One Mouse was fucking an Elephant in a coconut farm.
1 coconut fals on elephant's head.
ELPT-Ouch!
MOUSE-Ouch vouch kuch nahi Gandu, apna shot to aise hi hota hai.


12. What is pure Hindi name of Condom??
Rubber ki Chiknai yukt Prajanan virodhak mardana Ling ki topi.


13. Question : What is Long & Hard, has a hole at the tip and when u insert it into a wet,
hairy & tight hole makes u feel better?
Answer : Vicks Inhaler


14. Girl : Tum ladke kisi bhi ladki me sabse pehle kya dekhte ho?
Boy : Ye to depend karta hai ki ladki aa rahi hai ya ja rahi hai!!


15. Dur gaon me jab maa baap sote nahi the,
to bacha kehta hai, so ja bapu,
so ja, warna ek aur ho jayega!!!


16. non VEG
noN VEG
nON VEG
NON VEG
NON VEg
NON Veg
NON veg
NOn veg
Non veg
non veg

*
*

Muskura do yaar
non veg
message hai...



17. What is common between a
bus conductor and a gay Man?

Both shout peechey se Aaa



18.Iss aane vali thandi me aapko...

GHARWALI,

BAHARWALI,

SABJIWALI,

PADOSWALI,

COLLEGEWALI,

DOODHWALI,

KAMWALI,

FULWALI,
sab ka Pyar mile.


19. Yeh waqt nahin hai rone ka,
Yeh waqt hai baccha hone ka.
Uss waqt kyon nahin royee thi,
Jab chipak ke soyee thi
Ab jo kiya hai woh bharo,
Tab to kehti thi aur karo, aur karo...



20. Filmi names of penis.

1-2 ankur
3-5 masoom
6-8 parwarish
9-15 pariwartan
16-20 pyaasa
21-35 shikari
36-50 kabhi kabhi
51-60 kamchor
61-75 yaaden


21. Gabbar : Yeh haath mujhe dede Thakur

Thakur : Lele Bhenchod, lekin subah
8 baje meri gand dhone aa jaana!


22. Santa: Oye Murge kaise diye?
Murge wala: Rs 50, Rs 40, Rs 10
Santa: Rs 10 itna sasta kyo?

Saab ise aids hai....
Santa: de do mujhe khana hai
GAND thodi marna hai!


23. Election me jitne ke baad MANMOHAN Ji ne kaha

"Yeh to Sonia Ji ke hath ka kamal hai, Varna Is Umar me to mera khara hona mushkil tha."


24. Beta kya kaam karte ho?

"Ji samaj seva karta Hoon."

Matlab?

"Gire huve ko uthata hoon,
Bichade huye ko Milata hoon"

Woh Kaise?

"Bra banata hoon."


25. Beta kya kaam karte ho?

"Ji samaj seva karta Hoon."

Matlab?

"Gire huve ko uthata hoon,
Bichade huye ko Milata hoon"

Woh Kaise?

"Bra banata hoon."


26. 70 year old man says to his wife, Darling main tumhare liye chaand taare tod laaunga.

Wife replies, "Daant se roti to tootti nahi, gand se akhrod todne ki baat karte ho!"


27. Two girls returning from movie

1st: mere rupaye chori ho gaye!
2nd: tu to blouse mein rakhti thi phir kaise?
1st: muje kya pata saala chori kar raha hai.


28.Agar Gandhiji ke samay me AIDS hota to kya hota?

Toh chautha(4th) bandar underwear ke saamne haath karke khada hota.


29. Husband :plz. KARNE dona
Wife :nahi

Husb :PAKADNE to do
Wif :nahi

Hus :DABANE to do.
Wif :nahi

Hus :sirf DIKHAO to sahi.
Wif :nahi aaj to REMOTE pakadne nahi dungi uske BUTON bhi
dabane nahi dungi aur MATCH bhi dekhne nahi dungi.

Aj to sirial hi chalegi.
Aisa aap ke sath bhi hota hoga na


30. Kisi condom company ne world-cup ko sponser kiya hota to uski advt me aise likh te....

Cover your STUMP.
Before you PUMP!


31. Ansoo tere nikle to aankhein meri ho
Dil tera dhadke to dhadkan meri ho
Khuda kare ki apni dosti itni gehri ho,
Baap tu bane to Mehnat meri ho!


32. Machis aur Sex, donon mein
friction hota hi hai.
Bas, ek mein aag lagata hai,
dusre mein aag buzata hai,
par friction donon mein hota hai.


33. 3 gujrati women went to chaat shop.

Ist woman: manne chat.
2ND woman: manne ragdo(tikki).
3RD woman: manne pehle chat phir ragdo!!


34. Husband: Darling good night

Wife Aise kasie good night?
Pehle band kar light,
phir lund kar tight,
dubake kar fight,
jab nikal jaye white,
then i feel right,
phir good night!


35. On first night

Wife: aaj mera upwaas hai!

Husband slaped his wife and said
kya mere lund par aata laga hai
jo tera upwas toot jayega.