35 Hindi Most Funniest Non Veg Jokes Collection On February 07, 2014

Did you like hindi non veg jokes. here i collect top 35 hindi non veg jokes for you. dear! here you find some jokes are extremely adult. so please who are child please don't read those jokes.

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number:01

Sunny leone To Alok Nath: -jokes

.
Sleone :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo Tumhare PANT Me Hai
Aur Mere PATICOAT Me Nahi..?
.
Alok Nath :- " POCKET
.
Sleone :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo Din Me
Lene K Bajay RAAT Ko BISTAR Par Lete Hai,
.
Alok Nath :- " NEEND
.
Sleone :- " Wo Kya Hai Jo LADKI 1st Time
Karwane Par Jor Se Chillati Hai,
.
Alok Nath :- " KAAN Me CHHED,
.
Sleone :- " Wo Kya Hai Jiske AAdha Jane Par
DARD Hota Hai Par Pura Jane Par Accha Lagta
Hai,
.
Alok Nath :- " HATHO Me KANGAN
.
Sleone :- " Wo Kya Hai Jiske Paas Ho to HAATH
Me Pakad Kar Hilata Hai,
Aur Jiske Paas Na Ho To UNGLI Daal K Hilata Hai,
.
Alok Nath :- "TOOTH BRUSH"
.
Ye Hote Hai Sanskaar

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number:02

Ek Lady Dentist Ke Paas Gayi Chack Karane.

Dentist Check Karke Bola: “Kya Aap Oral B Karti Ho?”

Lady: “Ji Doctor Saab, Oral Bhi Karna Padta Hai, Uske Bina To Mere Husband Ka Khada Hi Nahi Hota.”

Ab Aap Batao Dirty Dentist Tha Ya Aurat?

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 03

Once Rajnikant Send A Non-Veg Joke To An Innocent And Religious Girl.

Today, That Girl Is Known As

“Sunny Leone“

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number:04

Teacher Ask a Question To The Whole Class.

“Students, Give 3 Advantage Of Banana.”

Boys:
1. Rich Calcium.
2. Reduces Cholesterol.
3. No Risk Of Cancer.

Girls:
1. No Risk Of Pregnancy.
2. No HIV.
3No Need Of Partner.

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 05

Santa Khana Khaate-Khaate Apni Biwi (Preeto) Pe Chillata Hai.

Santa: “Arey, Ye Sabzi Mein Baal Ka Guchha Kya Kar Raha Hai?”

Preeto: “Arrey, Wo Mere Neeche Ke Baal Hain.”

Santa: “Hadd Hai, Ye Sabzi Mein Kyu Daalein Hain?”

Preeto: “Aap Hi To Roz Kehte Ho Ki Khane Mein Jhaant Bhar Ka Bhi Swaad Nahi Aata, To Isliye Aaj Maine Daal Diye.“

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 06

Banta Bhaaga-Bhaaga Santa Ke Ghar Aaya Aur Khushi Se Bola.

Banta: “Oye Santa, Aaj TV Pe Rakhi Sawant, Apne 38-Inch Ke Boobs Dikhane Wali Hai”

Santa Udaas Hokar Bola: “Achha, Par Main Nahi Dekh Paunga”

Banta: “Kyu?”

Santa: “Mera TV To Sirf 21-Inch Ka Hai?“

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 07

Ek NRI India Ghumne Aaya Aur Usne Tea-Stall Par Jakar Ek Chai Order Ki.

NRI Ko Ek Chhota Ladka Chai Dene Aaya, Jisne Chai Ke Cup Ko Peene Wale Hisse Se Andar Ki Taraf Se Pakda Hua Tha.

NRI Ne Chai Ka Ek Ghoot Piya Aur Bola: “Tum Log Kab Sudhroge? Chai Is Tarah Nahi Pakadte, Ungli Nahi Doobate Chai Mein”

Ladka: “Sahab Ungli Mein Dard Hai, Dr. Ne Senkne Ke Liye Kaha Tha”

NRI Gusse Se Bola: “Bhonsdi Ke Apni Gaand Mein Rakh Ungli, Wahaan Sabse Jayada Senk Milega”

Ladka: “Sahab Abhi Tak Udhar Hi Thi, Aapke Order Ke Baad Nikalni Padi“

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 08

Secretary Complaining With Friend About Her Boss:

He Is So Crazy About Sex

He Tells Me To Do Laptop & Then Desktop Position Followed By Spreadsheet Format

He Tells Me To Convert His Soft Disc Into Hard Disc & He Installs Anti-Virus To Enter & Scrolls It In My C-Drive Till It Ejects.

Once I Tried To ESC But He Caught And Shifted Me To His Home Where He Started Pressing My Backspace Saying-Let Us Restart Again..!

When I Refuse He Threatens To Keep Me On Stand-By Position.

Many Times He Works Without Caps-Lock & Crashes My System Until He Logs-In And Looses His Ctrl.

The Process Continues Till I Zip Him & Shutdown His Main System.

But He Doesn’t Know That The Final Print-Out Of All This Data Will Be Handed Over To Him By Me Within A Few Months

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 09

Aajkal ki ladhiyon ki dress-
Yahan se less
Wahan se less
Kabhi sleeveless
Kabhi backless
Aur koi ladka ghoor kar dekhe to
KAMINA CHARACTERLESS

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 10

Boy went 2 Drop Aunti,
Aunti - Raat ho gayi hai bitu ke
pass so jao.
Boy - anti sofe per so jaunga
NEXT MRNG
A HOT Girl Making A tea Boy - AAP ?
GRL - i m bitu & u ?
Boy - ULLU ka PATHA..!!

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 11

Dosto,aaj hum 1
ajib Prani ke bareme padhenge..
Is jiv ka naam he..
"Girlfriend".
Yeh aksar College me payi jati
hai. Inka poustik aahar he Boyfriend
ka BHEJA aur wallet.
Inhe aksar naraz hone ka NATAK
karte hue dekha jata hai.
Is prani ka sabse khatarnak
hathiyar he RONA or emotionally blackmail karna.
uske Sampark me rehne se
TENSION
naam ki bimari ho sakti he,
Jiska koi ilaaj nahi.
bas inse savdhan rehna

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 12

teacher_ladke or ladki me kya
frk h...
stdent_ladki ek saal me ek hi br
ma bn skti h...bt
ladka ek saal me kitne b bacho
ka papa bn skta ...

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 13

Boy Friend on phone:
Hi dear muje teri bahut yaad aa
rahi hai
I seriously miss u! GF: Abhi to baat ki humne
BF: Arey phirse tuje hi lag gaya,
Sorry!!

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 14

Atif Aslam ki Love Story. Girl: Who ru?
Atif: Mein Ek dard hu ya Ek
Ehsas hu. Girl: Tum Mera Picha kyu karte
ho?
Atif: Bakhuda tumhi ho, har
Jagah tumhi ho. Girl: Akhir tum Chahte kya ho
ha?
Atif: kaise Bataye kyun tujhko
Chahe yara Baata na paye. Girl: Tum Mere liye kya kar
Sakte ho??
Atif: Jhumu Diwana ban ke tere
liye. Girl Thappad mar ke chali gayi-
Atif: Aab to Aadat si hai mujhko
aise Jeene mein.

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 14

Difference of Nature:
Two girls wearing same T-Shirt
Response: Kamini “COPIED MY
STYLE”
2 boys wearing same T-Shirt
Response: O Mera Bhai.

• Hindi Most Funny Non Veg Jokes Number: 15

Anniversary k moqa pr SANTA
apni biwi k liay gulab ka phool
le kr aya. BV: Mujhay ye nai chahiye, koi
soney ki cheez do. SanTa: Ye lo Takiya or so jao.;-)

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 16

What is a girlfriend? Russian:A cigrate when finished
drop it. . Irish:A bottle of Wine when
empty break it. . Santa: An Audio Cassette when
side A is finished use side B. .
Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 17
What is a girlfriend? Russian:A cigrate when finished
drop it. . Irish:A bottle of Wine when
empty break it. . Santa: An Audio Cassette when
side A is finished use side B.

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 18

 Police wala or fauji ek saath
train me safar kr rahe thy. Police: Ap chutti pe ja rahe he? Fauji: Han wife ki delivry he. Police: Kitne din baad ghr ja
rahe ho? Fauji: 2 saal baad. Police: Phr to hone wala bacha
harami hoga. Fauji: Mjhe konsa ghr rkhna
hai, , police me bharti kr doon
ga

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 19

 Baithe the aapki yaad me tanha
aj ki raat, Liya 1 kagaz aur likha aapka
nam. Tasvir banai aapki or likha ye
pegam Zinda pakarne wale ko
50,00,000 ka iinaam.

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 20

teacher_ladke or ladki me kya
frk h...
stdent_ladki ek saal me ek hi br
ma bn skti h...bt ladka ek saal
me kitne b bacho ka papa bn
skta ...

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes:21

Hanuman: bhagwan ab me
dharti par nahi reh sakta.
Bhagwan: Kyun?
Hanuman: dharti pe ab to ghor
kalyug aa gaya hai.
Aaj mandir me ek ladki aayi, hath hila kar boli- "HI,
HANU"whats up? Muh Q fula
rakha hai, grlfrnd ke saath
break up hogaya he kiya.

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes:22

Psychology ka practical ho raha
tha. :-D
Professor ne 1 Chuhe k liye 1
tarf
CAKE
Aur dusri trf CHUHIYA rakh di. Chuha fouran Cake ki trf lapka.
Dusri bar Cake ko badal kr ROTI
raki.
Chuha Roti ki trf lapka.
Is tarah kai bar food-item
badle magar
Chuha hr bar food ki trf bhaga.
Profesr: Bas, sabit ho gya ki
BHUKH hi
Sbse bdi taqat h.
Itne me last row ki bench se awaz
aai
Sir, 1 bar Chuhiya badal k bhi
dekh
lo,
ho skta h wo uski “BEHAN” ho..! :-
P

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 23

BOY- Hey girl, whats your
name? GIRL- Apne baap ko dhakka
maaro. BOY- What do you mean? GIRL- PUSH PAA.

Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 24
Santa :Samose kuch acche
lag nhi rhe hai, kya baat hai
Parso wale to bohot acche
bane the,
Dukandar :Aji Saheb, ye wohi
to hai

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 25

EK Baar Pinku aur uski puri
family car mein ja rahi
thi... Tabhi Police ne car ko
roka aur bola: Ye suraksha
week hai. Aap seat belt
pahenkar car chala rahe ho isliye aapko Rs 2500 ka inaam
diya jaata hai. Aap is inaam ka
kya karoge? Pinku: Main isse
apna driving license
banwaoonga. Tabhi uski maa
boli: Iski baat ka yakeen mat karo
Daaru peekar kuch bhi bolta
hai. Uske papa neend se jaage
aur police ko dekhke
bole: Mujhe pata tha ki chori ki
car mein hum zyada door nahin ja payenge....

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 26

Master to pinku - beta agar do
mein se do gye to
kitne
rhe? Pinku- samjh mein nhi aya
master g. Master-beta tumare
pas 2roti hai, tumne 2 roti khali,
tumare pas kya bacha? Pinku-
sabji.

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 27

First day of COLLEGE..
Boy sees a beautiful girl siting
right next to him and writes in a
paper..
“I love u, do u love me?”
and passes the paper to her.. She replies.. “no”
He didn’t give up
He rubbed her answer and
passed it on to another girl and
she replied.. “yes”
Moral of the story: Definitely not what u think..
Its…
“Save earth… Recycle
paper!!” :-P :-D

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 28

Santa ne Nokia ka sabse badi
screen wala mobile le liya
. . . Kyon??????
. ...
. . Kyonki Woh dekna chahta tha
hae ki, Phone switch ON karne per kaun
se 2 log hath milate hae......

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 29

Beta:
mummy kya love marriage karny
say
ghar walay naaraz hote hain
kya ?
Maa: Tu yakenan kisi churail k chakar
main hoga
or ye sub tujhe usi daayan ne
kaha hoga,
Larkiyan to bus larkon ko
phansaanay main he lagi rehti hain :/
Jahan Acha Larka dekha shuru
hogaien,
Beta in se bach k rehna ye
bohat makkar or
KAMEENI hoti hain or inka to khandan
bhi…...
.
Beta:
aisa kuch nahi hai, Wo to dAddy
bata rahey thay k Aap Dono ki Love Marriage
thee :-D

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 30

4-5 dost beer pee rahe the
tabhi
table pr rakha mobile baja-
Boy-Hello
Gf-main market me hu kya m 50
hazar wala gold set le lu Boy-Ha lelo
Gf-Ek silk suit bhi lelu 5500 ka
h Boy-Ha janu lelo,suno 2-4
lelo
Gf-Thik h tumhara credit mere
paas h usi se le rahi hu
Boy-Thik hai
All Friends-Tu pagal h ya tujhe
chad gayi h Boy- abe wo sab
chodo aur ye batao
ye mobile kiska hai..?? :p =DD Har Ek Dost Kamina Hota Hai

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 31

Ek budha BLUE FILM dekhte hue zor se hath ko jhatakne laga

Boy-kya hua baba?

Budha-iski Maa ko chodu sala...15 sal bad lund khda hua to BHENCHOD hath sunn ho gaya.

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 32

Teacher: What is love….???
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Student:
‘L’ ko hath me lekar
‘O’ ko dabate hue
‘V’ me dalte waqt jo
‘E’ ki aawaz nikalti hai
use hi LOVE kahte hai..!!

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 33

:If girls is in love, her parents
asks : Who is that idiot ? If boyz
is in love, his parents asks ?
Idiot who is that girl ? MORAL :
No matter whoever in love,
Boyz are always IDIOTS!!

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 34

Santa- Meri Biwi Bahut
Kharchili He,
Jab Bi Dekho 100/,200/rs
Mangti Rehti He,. Banta- unn Paiso Ka Wo Karti
Kya He.? Santa- Kya Pata,
Maine Kabhi Diye hi Nahi...

• Funniest Top 35 Hindi Non Veg Jokes: 35 

Govt.School K Bache Kisi Ko
Ghaseet K School
Le Ja Rahe The.
Buzurg- Ise chod Do Padna hoga
to YeKhud
School Aayega. Boys-Ye Student Nahi MASTER
Hai taau.