Desi Non Veg Jokes in Hindi Language:

एक महिला दूसरी महिला से – क्या तुम्हारी सास बीमार थी कैसे मर गई ?
दूसरी महिला पहली महिला से – दरअसल अतिम संस्कार के समानो मे पचास परसेंट की छूट चल रही थी सो मेरी सास ने उसी का फायदा उठाया और मर गई

WATCH HOT INDIAN CLIPS IN HINDIsmsjoks.blogspot.com

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Desi Non Veg Jokes in Hindi Language:

बाप- बेटा मैंने तेरे लिए एक लड़की देखी है, वो रूपवती, गुणवती और सरस्वती है।
बेटा- लेकिन पापा मैं किसी ओर से प्यार करता हूं और वो गर्भवती है।

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Desi Non Veg Jokes in Hindi Language:

एक बार एक गाँव में नसबन्दी शिविर चल रहा था, लोगों को जबरन पकड़-पकड़ कर नसबन्दी की जा रही थी, ऐसे में एक झोपड़े में जब कर्मचारी पहुँचे तो उन्हें वहाँ एक अधेड़ व्यक्ति मिला। उन्होंने उसे भी पकड़ लिया और जबरन नसबन्दी कराने ले चले। उसने कहा कि “भाई मेरी नसबन्दी हो चुकी है…” लेकिन कर्मचारी फ़िर भी नहीं माने तब वह भड़क कर बोला… “साले… लाइन तो पहले ही काट चुके हो, अब क्या मीटर भी उखाड़कर ले जाओगे?”

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Non Veg Jokes in Hindi

एग्ज़ॅम और सुहाग रात के बाद कामन डाइलॉग-

कैसा हुआ.?

अच्छा हुआ,

थोड़ा बड़ा था

थोड़ा छूट गया,

आता था पर ठीक से कर नही पया.

फिर भी जैसा हुआ अच्छा हुआ.

Non Veg Jokes in hindi

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To Read More Non Veg Jokes Visit:

नहाते हुए चुमू: नॉन वेज जोक्स

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लड़का लड़की प्यार कर रहे थे.

लड़का बोला:- क्या हम शादी कर ले?

लड़की बोली:- कमीने, मज़दूर हो मज़दूरी करो. फैक्ट्री का मलिक बनने की कोशिश मत करो!

अन्य मजेदार चुटकुले: HINDI SHAYARI

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संता: यार मान ले दुनिया में औरतें सिलेंडर की तरह होती तो क्या होता?

बंता: होना था क्या आज इसके घर कल उसके घर होता?

Parchhayi Meri Bhi Maine Tere Naam Kar Rakhi Hai
Har Saans Meri Tere Naam Kar Rakhi Hai
Tere Inkaar Ne Itna Paagal Bana Diya Hai
Duniya Ne Meri Zindagi Badnaam Kar Rakhi Hai

Bangla Love SMS-1.

Ai Mon chai sudu tomai Valobasi,
Ai Mon chai sudu tomar kacha Aasi,
Ai Mon chai 2mer mukher aktu Hasi,
Ai Mon chai sudu thakte 2mer Pasapase

Bangla Love SMS-2.

Bestota amake dayna obosor,
Tai bole vabona amay sarthopor,
jakhane e thaki, houki joto e dure,
2me aso sarakhon ai hridoy jure

Bangla Love SMS-3.

Hridoy khula shopa dilam turi chorine,
Eccha hole agle rakhis hridoy er gohine,
Aoniccha ta chura falis kuno ek dustbine,

Bangla Love SMS-4.

Na jena na suna kokhono,Diyo nako mon.
Na jena na suna kokhono,Diyo nako mon.
Valo kore aage take jane nao,Sa kamon doron.
Aabeg ta komia alap ta jomia age jena nao tar vetor goron..Pore dio Mon!

Bangla Love SMS-5.

Hoyto tomai valobesa korechilam vhul,
Taito akhon dicchi sai vhular e mashool,
Phool vabe tumari sudu kortam sadona...
Tai bodhoy soite hochcha katar jontrona.

Bangla Love SMS-6.

Tumi achho bolei ekta notun shokal,
ekta notun alor roshni dekhi.
Shawpno dekhe beche thaker.
Ar amake ami khuje pai, ei prithibite.

Bangla Love SMS-7.

Amake sms korte thako ebong jite nao akorshonio puroshkar. 1:onek bhalobasha. 2:azibon bondhutto. 3:amar hridoye obosthan, ekdom bina mulle. Prostaber meyad totodin, ami beche achhi joto din.

Bangla Love SMS-8.

Fuler shob koli dek shubash tomay. Shurjer shob roshni jeno dey alo tomay. Amar to kichhu nei, deyar jonno tomay. Kintu ami chai, je dey she jeno shobi dey tomay.

Bangla Love SMS-9.

Hawar poroshe je gaan, shurjer aloy je ushnota, chander kirone je proshanti. Tumi na thakle bujhtei partamna. Tomer preme jibonta hoea utese modhumoy.

Bangla Love SMS-10.

Ojosro bhalobasha tomar jonno, Opirimeyo.
Ami jani ami parbona hote Majnu ba Farhad,
emonki Devdash-o. Tai bole bhebhona kom bhalobashi tomay.

Bangla Friendship SMS-1.

Bondhu mane khola akash,
Bondhu mane mukti,
Bondhu mane sarajibon pase thakar chukti,
Bondhu mane ektu mondo, onek khani valo,
Bondhu mane ek sathe hajar tarar alo!

Bangla Friendship SMS-2.

Bondhutto holo, haat ebong chokher moddhe shomporker moton. jokhon haate kono aghat lage, tokhon chokher osru jhore. Abar, jokhon chokher osru jhore, tokhon haat ta muchhe dey.

Bangla Friendship SMS-3.

Bondo 2me hoea gesso amar khub Dear,
Amakeo rekho 2mer ridoyer Near,
Allah chara kawke 2me korona Fear,
Dekhbe kovu jibona 2mer asbena Tear

Bangla Friendship SMS-4.

Rater Akase takale dekhi lokkho Tarar mela,
Ak Chad k ghira jano sob tarar khela,
Bondo onek pawa jai baralay hat,
Amar kacha tui je Bondu Oi Akaser e Chad!

Bangla Friendship SMS-5.

Jani Na Ke Kal Kothai Robe;
Ki Pabe Ar Ki Harabe;
Diner Shese Jokhon Eshe;
Chobe Amay Dhusor Alo;
Bhabbo Ami Ekla Bose;
Bondhura Sob Ache Bhalo……

Bangla Friendship SMS-6.

Allah ke bollam amake ekti brikkho dite, tini dilen bon. Bollam ekti ful dite, tini dilen bagan. Take bollam ekti beheshto dite, tini dilen tomar moton ekjon bondhu.

Bangla Friendship SMS-7.

Jibone jokhon tomar moto shongi elo, bhanga tori jeno tirer dekha pelo. He bondhu, prarthona kori tomar jibon khushite bhore uthhuk, aloy jholmol koruk. Jodi kokhono tomar jibon andhare chheye jay, alor jonno khoda jeno amakei jalay.

Bangla Friendship SMS-8.

Kichu megh eka,
kichu bristy osru,
Kichu alo biborno,
Kichu adar ononto,
Kichu kosto ferari,
Kichu asha Opurno,
Kichu samporko obinossor....
Jemon bondutto.

Bangla Friendship SMS-9.

Valobasha bihin jibon holo 1 ta fol hin gas,
Kintu bondu bihin jibon holo mul hin gas,
Gas fol sar bachte pare kintu mul sara bachte pare na.

Bangla Friendship SMS-10.

Bondhutto holo kachar moto,
Vengge gelo jora lage na,
Jodio jora lage kintu dag roea jay.

A LADY GOES TO POLICE STATION AND LODGES A COMPLAINT : INSPECTOR SAHAB, AIK NAY MAIRAY BOOBS DABAYE.AIK NAY MAIRI GAAND MARI.AIK NAY MUJHAY CHODA.AIK NAY MUJHAY CHOOMA. INSPECTOR : BAS KAR. F.I.R LIKHWA RAHI HAI YA LUN KHARA KAR RAHI HAI!

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A Girl visit for a urione test. By mistake her reports change. Dr says her. U r pregnent. Girls reply. Oh God Ab tu ungali ka b Barosa nahi raha
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what PEPSI stands for
P=please
E=enter
P=penis
S=slowly
I=inside
ha..ha..ha..hy.. Ye dil magay more
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Women's top 7 lies :- 1. I love you 2. I am virgin 3. I hate sex 4. You are the first one touching me 5. Oh its too big? How wld it go inside? 6. I hate sucking 7. Alright - but u wld do it only once!
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2 girls returning 4m movie, 1st: Mera purse chori ho gaya.
2nd: Per tu to bra mein rakhti thi.
1st: Mujhe kya pata saala chori kar raha hai.
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Yeh waqt nahin hai rone ka, Yeh waqt hai baccha hone ka. Uss waqt kyon nahin royee thi, Jab chipak ke soyee thi. Ab jo kiya hai woh bharo, Tab to kehti thi aur karo, aur karo........
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Arz kiya hai..
College se nikalte hi kitab sine se laga leti ho! Hum kya mar gaye jo khud hi dabaa leti ho!!
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8 yrs old boy caught in RAPE case. lady lawyer holds his penis & says: Your Honour, kya yeh bacha rape kar saktah hai? Boy says silently: hila mat werna case haar jai GEE
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Janeman mujhe mar dalo ..
zara meri pant ki jaab mai haath dalo...
lamba lage to kaat dalo......
mota laaga tu chaat daloo....
acha laga tu apni gand main dalo...
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A man phoned and asked,'221714' ?
Lady: Pls hindi mein bolo.
Man: Do- Do-Ek-Sath-Choda ?
Lady: "Nahein sir, ghalt kaha! yeah Teen-Teen-Ek- Sath-Choda hai"
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Man says to his wife : Let me take a picture of your breasts, than I can always look at them. Wife : Let me take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged
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Lady to man: why you always keep condom & taveez together in your wallet.
Man: bhoot aur choot ka koi pata nahi kabhi bhi mil jaye.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- larka : dil karta hai tere zulfon mein kho jaoon... teri bahon mein jhull jaoonn.... teri anchal mein soo jaoonnn...
larki : Sale Bhosri k to neechey kia muhaley wale ghuseinge.

A Collection of Non Veg Jokes,Hindi Non Veg Jokes,Santa Banta Jokes,Punjabi Jokes,Majedar Chutkule from Net

**Bangla Jokes Collection
1st: ei janis to amar dictionary te na osombob bole kono kotha nei!
ami ja ichhe korte pari!
2nd: jah! Toke ebhabe thokalo dokandar!
ei jonnei bolechilam dekhe sune dictionary keno!
**
Chhele:baba, janoto aaj class e mam ekta question korechilo jar ans sudhu ami dite perechhi!
Baba:ei to amar sona chhele. Ki prosno korechhilen mam?
Chhele:ke blackboard e susu korechhe?
**
Tourist:”ei konkal ta kar?
Guide:tipu sultan er.
Tourist: ar oi paashe oi chhoto konkal ta kar?
Guide: ota tipu sultan er chhotobelar konkal.
**
Woman:amar husband bazar e alu kinte gechhilo
5 din hoye gelo, ekhono fereni! Plz kichhu korun!
Inspector: thik achhe ami dekhchhi
kintu…
etokkhon apni onno kichhu to ranna korte parten!
**
Ram:are dada, apni apnar auto er chaka keno khulchen?!
Auto-driver: apni ki kana naki!
dekhchhen an lekha achhe ‘parking only for 2 wheelers’!!
Have a nice day
**
Ram:are dad apni amay thokalen keno!!
Dokandar:kothya thokalam apnake! Bhalo radio i to diechhi!
Ram:chhai bhalo! Lekha chhe made in Japan aar chalale bolchhe,
this is All India Radio!!
**
Ek bachha mosha tar prothom uraan bhore ghore firlo.
Maa mosh jigges korlo: kemon laglo bachha?
Bachha mosh bollo: darun laglo, maa, sobai amar jonno hat tali dichhilo!
**
USA te proti bochhor Edison er jonmodin upolokkhe 2 min load shedding hoy.
Kintu amra indian ra aro beshi honour dekhanor jonno
Sara bochhor roj 3 ghonta power cut kore tar jonmodin palon kori.
**
Ram: kibhabe ami amar baba ke bolbo je ami ebar o fail korechhi?
Shyam: ekta telegram kor lekh.
**
Teacher: kew bolte parbe kakotaliyo er ekta example?
Student. Haan sir,
…………… amar maa aar baba er biyer din aar somoy ekebare same!!
eke bole kakotaliyo byapar!!
**
Husband : ki khabar baniyechho? Gobar er moto khete lagchhe!!
Wife: hey bhogoban e kemno loker sathe biye holo amar!
tumi ki ki kheyechho go jibone?
gobor kemon khete hoy tao jano!!
**
Recession er result:
Ekhon economy er emon obostha. Je
je….
…
Meyerao aajkal bhalobasa dekhe biye korchhe!!
**
2jon lok ek uchu barir chhad theke laaf dichhe
1st: eta amar 50th jump, ami recordholder.
2nd: eta amar 1st jump, ami ekjon shareholder.
**
Ek ortho-surgeon tar patient ke bolchhe:
“apnar jonno ekta bhalo arekta kharap khobor achhe.
Bhalo khobor holo je apnar je paa ta kharap chhilo ota thik hoye gechhe.
Aar kharap khobor holo apnar je paa ta bhalo chhilo ota amar operation e kharap hoe gechhe..
**
A: amar chhele ekebare sonay sohaga.
B:tomar chele smoke kore?
A:na.
B: drink kore?
A: na
B: sotty tomar chhele sonay sohaga.ta boyosh koto tomar chheler?
A: 6 maas.
**
Munnabhai: jodi toke kukur kamray jetar daant nei, tui ki korbi?
Circuit: are bhai eto khub i soja.
injection nebo, needle chhara.
**
Height of hope:
Ek chhele xam hall e bose achhe..
Se nijeke bojachhe:
…
….
Chintar kichhu nei..
..
Xam pichhiye jabe.
**
Ekta hathi, bagh ar suor ekdin kotha bolchilo nijeder moddhye.
Hathi: amar awaz sune jungle er sobai bhoy pay.
Bagh: amar gorjon e boner sob jontu kepe othe!
Suor: chho! Amake sudhu ektu kashte hoy,tatei gota duniya bhoy e kepe othe
**
Ami tomay sudhu etuku I bolte chai je, tumi amar khub priyo bondhu.tumi kadle,ami kadi, tumi hasle, ami hasi….tumi jokhon janala diye jhaap dao,ami niche dekhi, abar
hasi..:P
**
Hey, sobsomoy mone rakhte murkhoami chhara, gyan thakte pare na, ugliness chhara, beauty thakte pare na.tai bolchhi …..
….ei world e tomar dorkar achhe.
**
Ek investor tar secretary ke bollo:
“ami bhablam amader economy boom korbe.”
Secrtary: “na sir, ota amader investment crash howar sound chhilo”
**
Alibaba and recession:
Alibaba aar tar 40 jon chor chhilo.
Kintu ekhon matro 30 jon chor baki achhe.
……..
Recession e 10 jon er chakri gechhe.
**
Stock market holo emon ek jaiga jekhane
Takawala lokjon experienced loker kachhe jay.
Aar experience wala lokjon taka pay.
Takawala lokera pay sudhu experience.
**
Sensex e 50% er loss hoechhe.
Ekhon sona, jomi kinle sob jole jabe.
Tai
Love
Friendship
Relationship
Feelings
Esob e invest koro
Sobsomoy bhalo return pabe.
**
Chhele: baba, amake choshma kine dao, ami durer jinis kichhu dekhte pai na!
baba chhele ke baire niye gelo.
Surjo er dike dekhiye bollo: ota dekhte pachhis?
Chheleo bollo:haan,pabo na keon?
Baba:tobe re beta! Aar kotodur dekhte chaas tui?!!
**
Ram:”ei shyam,amai amar money bag barite rekhe esechhi, amay 1000 taka dhaar dite parbi?”
shyam ram ke 10 taka dhriye diye bollo:
“ja chinta koris na, riksha niye bari ja,
Aar money bag ta niye aye”
**
Ek mahajna ek kanjus er bari gelo taka ushul korte.
Mahajan:”tomar baba amr kachh theke 5000 taka dhaar niechhe
Tar 10% suder rate e 1 bochhor e koto hoy?
Chhele: kichhui na.
Mahajan: tumi dekhchhi onko ekebarei jano na.
Chhele:”ami onko jani,kintu apni amar babake janen na….:P
**
Doctor Patient Jokes in Bengali
Doctor: apnar choshma lagbe.
Patient: apni ki kore bujhlen apni to amay check o korlen na.
Doctor: apni jeta dorja bhebe bhetore dhuklen, seta asole ekta janal chhilo.
**
Ek patient sue chhilo ek hospital er bed e.
Patient:doctor, ami amar paa e kichhu feel korchhi na!
Doctor: ami jani, ami bhul kore apnar hath duto kete felechhi.
**
Dactar ra sobsomoy hotash koren!
Ami 2 maas por doctor er appointment pelam.
Dactar er kachhe gelam.
Uni bollen I m sorry. Issh! Apni jodi 2 maas age amar kachhe asten!
**
Patient:amar bachar chance koto ta ?
Doctor: 100%,medical theory bole ei rog e 10 joner moddhe 9 jon rugi mara jai.
……….. Apni amar 10 number rugi.
ager 9 jon maara gechhen.
**
Student and Exam Jokes in Bengali
Manusher brain ek ajob jontro!
Dine 24 ghonta, bochhore 365 din kaaj kore
Jnmo theke kaaj kore.
Sudhu exam hall e dhokar agei kaj bondho kore dey!
**
Teacher:achha boloto surjo beshi dorkari na chaand?
Student: sir chaand.
keno na raate jokhon kono alo thake na tokhon chaand alo dey.
**
Teacher: je onnojone sunte na chaileo onorgol kotha bole jay take ki bola hoy?
Student: sir,
tader bola hoy..
….
Teacher.
**
Teacher: jano george washington tar babar pota gachh kete felechhilen aar nijei baba ke se kotha bolechilen. Tar baba take kono sasti den ni. Keno bolte paro?
Student:kenona kuthar ta tokhono tar hath ei chhilo.
**
Ekbar ek skul theke sob student der museum dekhte niye jawa holo.
Ekj student dekhte giye ekta purono murti bhenge fele!
Curator rege giye bollo: “jano ei murti ta 100 bochhor purono?”
Student:” tao bhalo, ami bhablam ota notun!”
**
Teacher Student Exam Professor School and College Jokes in Bengali
Exam hall e xam dite giye
Jodi dekho paper tough.
Chinta koro na.
Chokh bondho koro aar nijeke bolo:
“ei subject ta khub interesting,
ami ei subject ta abar porte chai.”
**
Ekta ghumonto bagh
Ekta uttejito kukurer theke beshi shatiman,
Temni
Ek ghumonto chhatro
Ek uttejito teacher er theke beshi bhalo.
By,
“Nikhil Bharatiyo Back Benchers Parishad”
**
Prof: murkho ra eto proshno kore je gyani ra birokto hoye poren.
Student:jani sir, amra sob exam ei eta bujhte pari.
**
Ekjon lecturer maa er cheyeo mahan.
Keno?
Maa sudhu tar bachha der ghum parate paare.
Kintu lecturer sob bachhader ghum pariye dey..
**
Exam e aschhe T20:
Xam time 1 ghonta aar full marks 50 kombe.
15 min por por break,
Free hit marks thakbe kothin question er jonno.
Prothom 30 min powerplay:kono supervisor thakbe na.
Cheer girls thakbe jara proti page lekha sesh hole nachbe.
**
janam,moron ekbar.
Bhalobasa o ase ekbar.
Biye o hoy ekbar.
Kintu ei xam keno ase bar bar!
**
Comedy Jokes in Bengali
Kichhudin age amake ekta meye call korechilo:”hello, tumi amar barite chole eso,kew nei barite.
Ami meyetar bari giye dekhi sotty kew barite nei…
**
Ami tomay sudhu etuku I bolte chai je, tumi amar khub priyo bondhu.tumi kadle,ami kadi, tumi hasle, ami hasi….tumi jokhon janala diye jhaap dao,ami niche dekhi, abar
hasi..:P
**
Hey, sobsomoy mone rakhte murkhoami chhara, gyan thakte pare na, ugliness chhara, beauty thakte pare na.tai bolchhi …..
….ei world e tomar dorkar achhe
**
Amar raate ghum nei,
Amar dine kaaj nei,
Ami bhagwan ke jigges korlam,”am I in love?”
Bhagwan bollen:”na botsyo, samnei tomar result..”
**
Talent, bhagyo ar problem er difference ki?
2to chele 1 ta meyeke bhalobase=problem
1ta chhele 2to meyeke bhalobase=talent
2to meye ekta chhele ke bhalobase=bhaggyo.
**
attitude kake bole?
3te pipre ekta hathi ke aste dekhlo.
1st: amra ota ke mere felbo.
2nd:amra or thang bhenge debo.
3rd: bechara ke chhere de, amra 3jon o eka.eta thik noi.
**
Raate chand dine alo, keno tomay lage bhalo?
Glap lal kokil kalo,sobar cheye tumi bhalo.
Akash nil,majhe sada,
gowal ghore tumi badha…
**
Hey! Amar ekta upokar korbe? Tomar ekta chhobi tule amay send korona..
Ami cards khelchhi ,kintu joker ta khuje pawa jachhe na….
**
jodi kono meyeke bipode help koro,
se sobsomoy tomar kotha mone rakhbe.
sudhu jokhon se abar kono bipode porbe..
**
teacher:achha boloto,
“i am beautiful” eta kon tense hobe in english?
student:mam, eta surely past tense i hobe!

**
ekdin wife ekta gadha ke dhore bari niye aschhilo
husband:ei patha take kothay pele?
wife:dekhte pachho na? eta gadha!
husband:are gadha kei to jigges korlam!!
**
soldier:sir, amader palabar poth nei.
amader shotrura chardik theke ghire felechhe!
major:darun.
ekhon amara tahole jekono dike attack korte pari!
**
ekta mota lok ekta train er kamra te bose chhilo.
sei dekhe ekta lok moja kore bollo:
dada,ei kamra ki sudhu hathi der jonno?
fat man:na na dada,
apnader mtoto badro ra chaile boste pare..
**
diner:ki je koro na!
dim gulo te eto nun keno diechho?
waiter:sir, kichhu mone korben na plz.
asole murgi ta high pressure e bhugchhilo tai
dimgulo nonta!!
**
ekta chhele ekdin naach dekhte gelo
tar maa rege jigges korlen:
okhane giye emon kichu dekhisni to jeta tor dekha uchit noy?!
son:haa. ami babake dekhlam
**
ekta chhele ar ekta meye park e bose chhilo..
chheleta meyetake kiss korte gelo.
girl:uhu! biyer age esob kichhu noy!
boy:dnt worry! dear. amar biye hoye gechhe.
**
boyfrnd:i love u
grlfrnd:mee too
boyfrnd:tumi amay kotota bhalobaso?
grlfrnd:tumi amay jotota bhalobaso thik tototai.
boyfrnd:cheater! ami bhabtam tumi amay sotty bhalobaso!!
**
ekjon sottikarer musci lover kake bole?
ekta meye bathroom e gaan gaichhe
snan korte korte…
aar ekta chhele keyhole er kachhe
giye nijer chokh na use kore
kaan use korchhe!!
**
teacher:Algebra:
a=b
aar b=c
mane
a=c
**
ekhon amay erokom arekta example bolo.
student:sir, ami apnake bhalobasi.
aar apni panra meyeke bhalobasen.
taar mane holo, ami apnar meyeke bhalobasi…
**
chhele aar meyer modhhe ki farak?
jodi ekta chhele ekt meyeke chithhi lekhe,
loke bole”loafer”
aar jodi kono meye kono chhelek chithi lekhe,
take loke bole”pffer”
tofat bujhle?
**
buyer:ami ki kore bujhbo je eta khati modhu?
seller:apnar kukur take din khete.
jodi na khay tahole bujhben eta khati modhu
buyer:aar jodi amar kukur et kheye ney?
seller:tahole bujhben eta sottikarer kukur noy..
**
wife:amar sathe 10 bochhor?
husband:jeno ek second er moto.
wife:1000 taka ki?
husband:ekta coin
wife:ok,amay 10 ta coin dao.
husband:ek second daro..
**
Hilarious Bengali Jokes
ekta juboti meye ek buro lok ke biye korlo.
sobai jiggges korlo:
“er modhhe tumi ki dekhle?”
girl:”ek to er income, aar tarpor er din o kom..
**
himesh ekta picture joom korbe.
ki kore?
?
?
?
?
?
“zara zoom zoom,
zara zoom zoom…”
**
bondhura,
ami gandhijir photo collect korchhi
tomader sobar kachhe tai abedon
kichhu photo diye amay help koro.
sudhu ektai condition achhe:
photo ta 500 othoba 1000 takar note er opor thakte hobe
**
ami ekjon bharate khuni.
amai poisar jonno khun kori.
ami ekjon khuni
ami poisar jonno khun kori
kintu tumi chinta koro na.
tumi to amar bondhu,
tai tomay ami bina poisay khun korbo!
**
teacher:kono book bestseller hote gele
book tate ki ki thaka uchit?
student:sir,
book er cover e ekta meye
aar meyer gaye no cover.
**
boy:tumi amay bhalobaso karon,
aamar baba amar jonno onek taka rekhe gechhen.
tai na??
girl:na idiot!
ami tomay bhalobasi karon.
ami parowa korina, ke tomay eto taka rekhe gechhe!!
**
chhele driving licence pawar por tar babar 1st advice:
“dekho baba jekhane hok ar jake hok dhakka maaro,
kintu sudhu sosta jinish ei dhakka mero.”
***
husband:amader chheleta puro amar brain peyechhe.
wife:amaro tai mone hoy..
karon amar brain ta ekhono amar sathei achhe!

**
man:tomara babar boyosh koto?
son:amar aar amar babar boyosh same
man:ki!! eta ki kore sombhob??!:O
son:are,amai jonmanor por i to uni baba hoyechhen!
***
diner:ami ei pocha machh khete parchhina.
tomader manager kothay? dako onake.
waiter:sorry sir, onake dekeo laav nei.
uni o oi pocha machh khaben na.
**
keno hathi ra
eto bor
kalo
hoy?
karon.
..
.
.
.
.
ora jodi sda, ar chhoto arhoto
tahoel oder ke
tablet bola hoto
**
Funny Bengali SMS and Jokes
ilu mane ki?
i=i
l=love
u=urdu
ami urdu bhalobasi.
tumi ki bhable?
i love ujbuk..
setao thik,ami tomakeo bhalobasi.
**
husband aar gadha er modhhye ki farak?
ans:husband gadha hote pare.
kintu
gadha ra etotao gadha noy je husband hobe!

**
meye ar chumbok er modhhe ki farak?
?
.
.
.
chumboke er ekta positive side thake…
**
jodi prithibi tomar charpashe bonbon kore ghurte thake,
aar tomar hridoy er spondon bere jay,
tumi ki bhabbe egulo prem er lokkhon?
?
?
?
na munna,
eke bole high blood pressure!
**
balish holo sottkarer prem er moto.
tumi jokhon bipode poro tokhon oke jorie dhorte paro
jokhon kado,tokhon er opor sue kadte paro.
aar eke ador korte paro jokhon khub anondo hoy.
sottykarer bhalobasa chai,
bazar jao, 100 taka diye ekta balish kine aano..
**
Yash Johar ektu notun film banachhe
uni notun kono talent khujchen.
ami tomar naam suggest korechho
plz onar sathe giye dekha koro.
cinemar naam.
..
..
‘Aqal Ho Na Ho’
**
wife:ami more jete chai.
husband:ami o more jete chai
wife:keno? tumi keno morte chao?!
husband:eto khushi amar soibe na.
**
bhalobasa bondhutter pore hote pare.
kintu
bondhutto bhalobasar por hote pare na
karon.
..
osudh sudhu morar agei kaaj kore,
more gele aar kono kaje ase na
**
commerce prof: kono business suru korar sob cheye important finace soure ki?
student:sir, father-in-law
**
keno lsobar eker beshi grlfrnd thaka uchit.
karon monopoly sobsomoy baje dike niye jai.
aar competetion sobsomoy unnotir pothe niye jai..

**
sudhu 20% chheleder mathay budhhi thake.
tahole bakider kachhe ki thake?
.
.
.
?
?
tader kachhe grlfriend thake!
**
father:baba, ebar jonmodine tomar ki gift chai?
son:beshi kichhu na baba.
sudhu ekta radio,
jeta ekta sportscar er sate attach thakbe.
**
teacher:tumi ekta opodartho!
jano, tomar boyoshe Bill Gates class e 1st hoto!
student:kichhu mone korben na sir!
kintu apnar boyoshe hitler suicide korechilo!

**
grlfrnd:uff boddo tight!
boyfrnd:darao,ami thelchhi.
grlfrnd:jor kore dokao.
boyfrnd:ah.. parchhi na
grlfrnd:issh! byatha lagchhe.
boyfrnd:bad dao
..
..
.
.
ekta notun wedding ring kinte hbe.
**
ekta meye ekdin greeting card kinte gelo
grl:apnar kachhe kono romantic card achhe?
shopkeeper:eta dekho:”to the boy i ever loved”
grl:bah! great!
amake ei card 10 ta din.
**
biyer somoy keno husband wife hath dhore thake?
karon etai riti.
jemon boxer ra fight er age kore thake!!

**
ekta idur ekta beral ke ki bhabe propose korbe?
….
?
?
??
“Billo Rani Kaho Tou Abhi Jaan De Doon..
O Billo Rani..!!;-)
**
Moral of ghajini movie:
jokhon i nijer girlfriend er sathe dekha korte jabe,
nijer cell phone nite bhulo na.
aar
jokhon khub bipode porbe,
nijer mobile phone silent rakhbe.
**
tumi nachte jano?
?
?
?
jano na!
.
.
.
chesta koro
.
..
.
sotty parona?!
.
.
.
tar mane tumi pappu.
karon only pappu can’t dance..
**
girl:dear,amader engagement er din tumi amay ring debe to?
boy:sure, kotha theke ring korbo tomay?
landline na mobile??
**
jokhon akash e kalo megh kore,
tomar kotha i mone pore.
jokhon bristi hoy,
tomar kotha i mone pore.
jokhon sei bristi te ami bhije jai,
tokhon o tomakei sudhu mone pore.
ebaar boloto amar chhata ta kobe ferot debe?!!
**
doctor:apni aar 2 ghontar moddhe mara jaben.
apni ki karur sathe dekha korte chan?
patient:haan, amai ekjon bhalo doctor er sathe dekha korte chai.
**
teacher:who is Mahatma gandhi?
student:mahatma gandhi holen oi lokta jini
Munnabhai ke nijer girlfriend ke impress korar byapare help korechilen…
**
wife:issh! ami jodi newspaper hotam!
tahole saradin tomay hath e,tomar kachhe thaktam!
husband:sotty, tumi jodi amar newspaper hote!
tahole roj ami ekjon notun petam!
**
biye holo onekta public toilet er moto!
jara baire dariye thake, tara dhokar jonno mukhiye thake.
aar jara vetore achhe tara beronor jonno mukhiye thake!!
**
husband aar wife holo garir tyre er moto.
ekta kharap hoye gelei gari cholte pare na!
tai ..
sob somoy ekta spare tyre rakhbe..
**
Bhogoban sob jayga te thakte parben na bole
tini maa er shristi korechhen.
odike shoitan o sob jayga te thakte parbe na..
tai..
shashuri der shristi hoechhe!!
**
hi!
ami agami robibar e biye korchhi
tai ekta chhoto party o hobe.
khub kom lokjon kei dekchhi.
tumi o eso plz.
kono gift aante hobe na.
sudhu paarle biye korar moto ekta patri niye eso!!
**
ekta meye ekta chhele ke bollo:
tumi khub sundor,
khub handsome,
khub mishti..
oops..sorry..
tomake mishti bolte parbo na.
tahole pipre ra kheye sesh kore felbe!!
**
sundor ke?
tumi.
buddhiman ke?
tumi.
mishti ke?
tumi.
ke bhalo bondhu?
tumi
ke lier?
seta holam ami!

Its time to fun. so im trying to laugh people with some NonVeg and dirty Jokes. I post here Some Adult Jokes, Nonveg Jokes & Santa Banta Non Veg Jokes, Non Veg Jokes in English, Nonveg Jokes in Hindi and Non Veg Jokes in Punjabi. Here you can find nonveg shayri, hindi dirty shayari and non veg poems also.


Ek Din Santa Mele me Gaya.
Wahan 2 Line Lagi Thi. Ek Line ke Aage Likha Tha "Dekhne ke 20/- Rs."
Dusri Linke ke Aage Likha Tha "Karne ke 10/- Rs."
Santa Ne Karne ki Ticket Le Li.
Ander usko Karne  ke Liye Bakri Di Gayi.
Santa Ne Paise Wasulne ke Liye Bakri ki Le Li.

Next Day, Santa ne Dekhne ki Ticket Li.
Santa Ne Aage wale Admi Ko Pucha -
Santa : "Kyu Bhai, Ye Kya Dikhayege?"
Admi : "Aaj ka To Pata Nahi, Kal Ek Sardar Ko Bakri Ki Lete Hue Dikhaya Tha!!!".
.
.
Bechara Sata!!!



Jab Santa Fauj Mein Tha To Uso Sharat Laganey Ki Bahut Buri Aadat Thi Aur Sabhi Us Se Preshan Rehte The.

Ek Din Santa Major Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola -

Santa : "Sir, Yeh Meri Aakhiri Sharat Hai, Aur Woh Main Aapke Sath Lagana Chahta Hun." Major Khishi- Khushi Raji Ho Gaya, aur Bola- 

Major : "Bolo, Kya Sharat Hai?"

Santa : "Apko Bwaseer Hai".

Major : Main Sharat Lagata Hun Ke Nahi Hai".

Santa : "Main Ungli Daal Kar Check Karuga".

Major Khushi-Khushi Maan Gaya Aur Dono Me 5,000/- Rs. Ki Sharat Lag Gayi.

Santa Ne Major Ki "GAAND ME UNGLI" Daal Di.

Tabhi Bahar Se Jor Jor Se Rone Ki Aawaz Aane Lagi.

Major Pant Pehan Kar Bahar Gaya Aur Poocha-

Major : "Kya Hua?"

Staff : "Sir, Isne Humse 50,000/- Rs. Ki Sharat Lagai Thi Ki Major Ki Gaand Me Ungli Daal Ke Dikhaunga!"




 
 

Bangla jokes SMS-1.

Jail officer:Jail khaner vitore jara ase tara sobay durdanto chalak,tome control korte parbe ta?
Chakuri parthi: parbona mane? Beshi tere bere korle gar dore jail theke ber kore dibo.

Bangla jokes SMS-2.

Nate: Nana, 2mer boyos koto?
Nana: kure bsor.
Nate: bolo ki? Matro 20 bosor?
Nana: er beshi je ami gunte pare na.

Bangla jokes SMS-3.

Gonak: apne komse kom 100 bosor bachben,
Man: jodi na bache?
Gonak: ta hole ase amer 2 gale 2 ta char marben.

Bangla jokes SMS-4.

Chakuridata:ai job ar jonno amer akjon responsible lok lagbe
Chakute parthi:ami say lok jake apne khujsen.
Chakuridata: keno?
Chakuriparthi:ager chakurite kharap kusu gotle e Boss bolto ami er jonno responsible.

Bangla jokes SMS-5.

Sota bon: vi, ma bolsen tume koyta mas doreso bolte?
Boro vi: make gia bol, porer masta dorte parle 1 ta hobe.

Bangla jokes SMS-6.

Roge: Dakter sab,amake kukure kamrayse.
Doctor: apne janen na je amar roge dekhar somoy 4-8 ta.
Roge: ami ta jane,kintu oi hotochora kukur ta ar ota jane na.

Bangla jokes SMS-7.

Same: 2me ki vebeso ami gadha?
Wife: ate vabavabir ta kisu dekse na!

Bangla jokes SMS-8.

Wife: 2mer bondhu jake bia korte jasse sei meea ta akta dajjal, take baron koro.
Hus: keno baron korbo? Se ki amer somoy baron korsilo?

Bangla jokes SMS-9.

Matal: kire tor abba koy?
Boy: ki dorker?
Matal: ai talgasta chayte ailam, ata dia akta hater lathi banabo.
Boy: ai gasta abba mesowak korar jonno rekhe diease.

Bangla jokes SMS-10.

Ist friend: kire! Ai samanna agate akdom kahil! ak soptaho dore akber o gorer bahire jassis na je?
2nd friend: na, mane, je trak ta amake dakka dieasilo seter gaea lekha silo aber dekha hobe.
Posted by Ahasan at Sunday, April 19, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Saturday, 18 April 2009
71) Bangla funny SMS Collection-06

Bangla funny SMS-51.

Paglagarode ek pagoler oparetion hobe. Doctor, nurse shobai prostut. Kintu pagolta ekhono prostut hoy ni. Karon she ekhon amar sms-ta porte besto.

Bangla funny SMS-52.

ki shundor chokhgulo tomar. Ki mishti konthho tomar. Ki shundor chehara tomar. Khoda tomake emoni baniechhen je mone hoy- sheora gachh theke bujhi kono petni neme eshechhe.

Bangla funny SMS-53.

Eta ekta jadu. Tomar mobile er down key char bar chapo, tumi Aishwaria Rai ke tomar mobile dekhte pabe. Hay khoda ajo manush toke bekub banay?

Bangla funny SMS-54.

Taragulor shothhik shongkha gune ber koro, tomar mongol hobe. ************ ************** Kire bekub pathha? Dine- dupure tare gunchhish kenore?

Bangla funny SMS-55.

Jodi amar ekta camera thakto, ami tomar hashi, tomar smriti, tomar protiti muhurter chhobi tultam. Ar rakhtam...... amar............. rannaghore. Indurder bhoy dekhate.

Bangla funny SMS-56.

Ekta banorer tinta bachcha achhe. 1st ta khela korchhe, 2nd ta kola khachchhe ar 3rd ta holo she, je ei sms porchhe. Kire bandor kemon asot?

Bangla funny SMS-57.

Ore kharaper roshogolla, paper borfi, beimanir laddu, haramir chamcham, bodmayeshir payesh, dhokabazir shorbot, miththa kothar roshomalai- tumi na jaaa mishti!

Bangla funny SMS-58.

Allah beheshter janala khule amake dekhe jiggesh korlen, ajker dine tomar chahida ki? Ami bollam, he khoda doya kore shei shundor manushtar ichchha puron korun je amar sms ta porchhe.

Bangla funny SMS-59.

Jol pore- Pata nore, Moha GOBET SMS pore. Ore BEKUB rego-na, mobile chure felo-na. Ei SMS porbe Joto, Buddhi hobe Gorur moto.

Bangla funny SMS-60.

20 ta bosor dhore mon diea pora suna kore,
R parchina guru, sai j patsala theke suru.
Parar joto chele chilo, sobar ghore bou elo.
Ma bole mon dia por, somoy hole tui o badhbi ghor.
O re ar parchina guru, sai j patsala theke suru.
Obosese mayer doa puron holo, ghore amar futfute bou elo.
Ful sojja rate, ak Gusso ful hate,
Bou k sudhai, amar jibone tumie prothom,
tomar jibone ami ki tai? bou hese bole,
R parchina guru sei j patsala theke suru!
Posted by Ahasan at Saturday, April 18, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
70) Bangla funny SMS Collection-05

Bangla funny SMS-41.

ame ak rate sopna deklam tumi ulonggo hoe rastaey douraitaso .Ta dekha ekti kukur hastasa.Ami kukur atka jiggasa korlam tui hastaso kano.Kukur bollo ,ami jibona prothom kono prani dheklam jar lez samna.

Bangla funny SMS-42.

wife : akta khota bolbo marba nato?
hus: kija bolo na tome?
wife: ame pragrant
husb: ata to kusir khobor
wofe:biar aga akbar baba ka bolaselam babto marselo tae

Bangla funny SMS-43.

Akdin ak mayea Razaker huzur ke jiggas korlo,
Kono sele ke chumu dite pare?
Razaker huzur: Naozbillah
tayle kono lok ke chumu dite pare?
Razaker huzur: Astagfirullah
Apnake chumu dite pare?
Razaker huzur: Jee, Bismillah.

Bangla funny SMS-44.

O sms gie amar salam bolish. Save korle dhonnobad dish. Delit korle pashani bolish ar jodi na pore to sms charge nie nish.

Bangla funny SMS-45.

Chumo holo premer chabi. Prem holo bier tala. Bie holo bachcha- kachchar baxo.. Ar bachcha- holo Bangladesher shomoshsha (population). Tai chumo khaoa theke biroto thako.

Bangla funny SMS-46.

Ami pathore tomar nam likhlam, ar pathorta khoye gelo. Ami kagoje tomar nam likhlam, ar kagojta chhire gelo. Ami hreedoye tomar nam likhlam, ar amar "HEART ATTACK" hoye gelo!!!

Bangla funny SMS-47.

Ami thhik korechhilam, tomake prithibir shobcheye shundor ebong mishti upoharta pathhabo. Kintu postman chitkar kore bollo,...ber hooo haramjada postbox theke.

Bangla funny SMS-48.

2mi ekhon ki korchho, bolbo? Boi porchho? Na, na! gun shunchho? Uhu! Tv dekhchho? Nah! Yaah, dhore felechhi-- ! Amar sms porchho. Oh, ekhon tumi hashchho. Hashte thako.

Bangla funny SMS-49.

Shundori tumi hote paro, tai bole amio dekhte kharap noi. Shurommo dalane tumi thaktei paro, tai bole amio pother bhikheri noi. Bhalobeshar por bolchho je tumi bibahita, kan khule shune nao amio bachelor noi

Bangla funny SMS-50.

Mone achhe shei dintir kotha, jhir-jhir hawa boichhilo, train ta platform-e darolo, tumi amay dekhle, ami ekta close-up hashi dilam, tumi guti paye kachhe ele ar bolle Allahrwaste kichhu dengo baba!
Posted by Ahasan at Saturday, April 18, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Friday, 17 April 2009
69) Bangla Friendship SMS Collection-01.

Bangla Friendship SMS-1.

Bondhu mane khola akash,
Bondhu mane mukti,
Bondhu mane sarajibon pase thakar chukti,
Bondhu mane ektu mondo, onek khani valo,
Bondhu mane ek sathe hajar tarar alo!

Bangla Friendship SMS-2.

Bondhutto holo, haat ebong chokher moddhe shomporker moton. jokhon haate kono aghat lage, tokhon chokher osru jhore. Abar, jokhon chokher osru jhore, tokhon haat ta muchhe dey.

Bangla Friendship SMS-3.

Bondo 2me hoea gesso amar khub Dear,
Amakeo rekho 2mer ridoyer Near,
Allah chara kawke 2me korona Fear,
Dekhbe kovu jibona 2mer asbena Tear

Bangla Friendship SMS-4.

Rater Akase takale dekhi lokkho Tarar mela,
Ak Chad k ghira jano sob tarar khela,
Bondo onek pawa jai baralay hat,
Amar kacha tui je Bondu Oi Akaser e Chad!

Bangla Friendship SMS-5.

Jani Na Ke Kal Kothai Robe;
Ki Pabe Ar Ki Harabe;
Diner Shese Jokhon Eshe;
Chobe Amay Dhusor Alo;
Bhabbo Ami Ekla Bose;
Bondhura Sob Ache Bhalo……

Bangla Friendship SMS-6.

Allah ke bollam amake ekti brikkho dite, tini dilen bon. Bollam ekti ful dite, tini dilen bagan. Take bollam ekti beheshto dite, tini dilen tomar moton ekjon bondhu.

Bangla Friendship SMS-7.

Jibone jokhon tomar moto shongi elo, bhanga tori jeno tirer dekha pelo. He bondhu, prarthona kori tomar jibon khushite bhore uthhuk, aloy jholmol koruk. Jodi kokhono tomar jibon andhare chheye jay, alor jonno khoda jeno amakei jalay.

Bangla Friendship SMS-8.

Kichu megh eka,
kichu bristy osru,
Kichu alo biborno,
Kichu adar ononto,
Kichu kosto ferari,
Kichu asha Opurno,
Kichu samporko obinossor....
Jemon bondutto.

Bangla Friendship SMS-9.

Valobasha bihin jibon holo 1 ta fol hin gas,
Kintu bondu bihin jibon holo mul hin gas,
Gas fol sar bachte pare kintu mul sara bachte pare na.

Bangla Friendship SMS-10.

Bondhutto holo kachar moto,
Vengge gelo jora lage na,
Jodio jora lage kintu dag roea jay.
Posted by Ahasan at Friday, April 17, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Wednesday, 15 April 2009
55) Bangla funny SMS Collection-04

Bangla funny SMS-31.

Teacher: "Hasa" er English Ki ?
Student: LaF (Laugh)
Teacher: Good, Hasa-Hasi English ?
Student: LaFa-LaFi
Teacher: What ???

Bangla funny SMS-32.

Chadni Raat A: Soytan Gaan Gay, Iblish Tobla Bajay, Pori Ra Nache, Bandor Mula Chabay, Bekub Ra Mobile A Kotha Bole, Ahammok Ra Ghumay.Anyway "2mi Ato Rat A Mobile Nia Ki Koro?" 2me Kon Ta?

Bangla funny SMS-33.

Ami 5ti machi merechi tar moddhe 3ti machi gents, and 2ti machi ladies akhon apnader prosno thakte pare "gents-ladies ami ki vabe chinlam" tai na? ta hole sunun, 3ti machi bose-chilo seving crimer upor, R baki 2ti chilo lipsticker upor.

Bangla funny SMS-34.

Jekhane bondhutto, shekhane valolaga.
Jekhane valolaga, shekhane valobasha.
Jekhane valobasha, shekhane prem.
Jekhane prem, shekhane bicched.
Jekhane bicched, shekhane batha.
Ar jekhane batha, shekhane Tiger Bum.

Bangla funny SMS-35.

Desh bepi "NARI", "PURUSH" Digital jorip cholse.
Apni "NARI" hole amer number'a 10 tk R "PURUSH" hole 20 tk pathan. "HIJRA"hole plz tk pathaben na, amrai Bujhe nibo. Desher 1st Digital jorip Kaje help korun, Digital Bangladesh gorun.

Bangla funny SMS-36.

Jokhon sukh gulo aral hobe,
kacher manus por hobe,
kosto gulo pichu nebe,
chader alo nevy jabe,
sopno gulo venge jabe,
Tokhono hat barea dibo,
bolobo-GHASH GULO KHA!!

Bangla funny SMS-37.

Dokhiner janalay jokhon khub eka thaki,
Obelay meg kore, bristi name,
tokhon khub icche kore jante,
Ekhono 2mi ki ager motoi bisanay hishu koro?

Bangla funny SMS-38.

bangla film:
past: chere de shoitan, deho pabi to mon pabi na!
present: chere de shoitan,deho pabi kin2 moja pabi na!
future: chup kor shoitan, mon chaile mon pabi - deho chaile deho, sobi hobe ogochore - janbe na keho.

Bangla funny SMS-39.

In a party center, a boy get PROKITIR DAK & asked a girl-
Boy: Excuse me apu, poshrab korar jaygata dekhaben?
Girl: Ja dusto! 2mer ta age dekhaw tarpor amer ta!

Bangla funny SMS-40.

Amar basay kal tumar daoyat, tumar jonno ja ja korechi ta holo....
1)Tela Poka Chor-Chori.
2)Idurer Kabab. 3)Tiktikir jhol.
4)Mosha Vaji. 5)Masi Fry.
6)Chika Soup. 7)Snake Fried Rice.
8)Kechor Nudols. 9)Kaoya Biriyani.
10)Cats Bergar. 11)Beji vegetable Rolles. 12)Beng Vaja
Asbe kintu.........!!!!
Posted by Ahasan at Wednesday, April 15, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
54) Bangla funny SMS Collection-03

Bangla funny SMS-21.

Police: Public tore ato mair dilo ken?
Doshi: Ki r Komu! Amar 1 ta PHOTO 1 mohilar payer niche porcilo. Ami tare koilam "Apa, Sarita 1 tu tulen, Ami Photo tulum!"

Bangla funny SMS-22.

Korba?? Please. Koro na! kew dekhbena! Amon koru kenu! sudhu 1bar koru, khub moja lagbe, koru na pls jaan..sobai to kore.. koro na!pls..pls..1ta SMS!..

Bangla funny SMS-23.

A girl has gone to repair her umbrella.
Maker: kapor khul te hobe r rod ta soja kore vetore dhokaite hobe.
Girl: ja khusi koro kintu pani vetore pora cholbe na.

Bangla funny SMS-24.

Tomar akti haath diya amay dhoro, R ekti haath amar pichone dao. Ebar tomar thot diye amay sporsho koro, bujhe nao ami kotota hot ! Because I'm A cup of coffee.

Bangla funny SMS-25.

Happy birth day, sorry. Its Eid mubarak. No! No! Independent day. Oh! Shit! Victory day. Oh ALLAH! NEW YEAR. NO! NO! NO! IT'S VALENTINES DAY. OH YES! HAPPY-VALENTINE DAY :-)

Bangla funny SMS-26.

Ajob to! Obak kora bapar! Tumi ki always pregnant thako naki? Jokhoni tomake SMS kori tokhon e Delivery report Aase.....!

Bangla funny SMS-27.

Boli boli kore mor bola holo na,
Ridoyer dorjata khola holo na.
Sei khane dhuke dekho,
debo na to badha,
Likha ase shei khane
"TUMI AKTA GADHA”

Bangla funny SMS-28.

Tomar dur-dine ami hobo tumar sathi,
Amra dujone debo durer poth pari,
Amar hate thakbe tumar golar dori,
Tumi bolbe "HAMBA HAMBA" Ami debo bari..

Bangla funny SMS-29.

Amar Sorir Khub Kharap, Doctor Er Kase Gelam Kaaj Holo Naa.Hujur Er Kase Gelam,Tini Bollen "J Kono 1 Soytan-Lok K SMS korle E Valo Hoye Jabi" .. .. Aahhh, Ekhon Onek-Te Valo Laag-Se.

Bangla funny SMS-30.

Please Ektu koro, Ektu beshi koro,
Jato paro Tar cheo beshi koro, Jakhon paro takhon-e koro, Jekhane paro, sekhane koro. Ki.....??? -ki abar ? Ektu porashuna !
Posted by Ahasan at Wednesday, April 15, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
53) Bangla funny SMS Collection-02

Bangla funny SMS-11.

Du hat bariye akas pane chao,
Nijke pakhi mone hobe.
Josna rate chader pane chao,
Nijke Pori mone hobe.
Matir sobuj ghaser pane chao,
Nijke 'CHAGOL' mone hobe !

Bangla funny SMS-12.

Ai ..! Jabe..? Jabe Amer sathe..? Shohorer kolahol periye, shanto nodir tire... Ki jabe..? taratari bolo. tumi na gele onno riskshawala dakbo..!

Bangla funny SMS-13.

Ai SMS porle 2mi 'GADHA' r na porle 'BOLOD'. SMS kauk dekhale 'GORU' r na dekhale 'SAGOL' SMS pore mind korle 'VERA'r na korle 'DUMBA'. SMS delete korle 'BANDOR' r na korla 'HANUMAN. SMS back korle 'PAGOL' r na korle 'RAMSAGOL' so choice is ur's.

Bangla funny SMS-14.

Welcome to
www.love.com
Password: ********
Age: **
Sorry, Apnar prem korar boyos ses. Pls Try www.namaz_roza.com

Bangla funny SMS-15.

Onek meye "Mula" dia kore, Abar Onek meye "Gajor" dia o kore abar onek meye "Sosha" Dia o kore. Abar sobkisu eksathe dia o kore.... Ke kore...? "Salad toyri kore"

Bangla funny SMS-16.

I am sorry dosto ato din ami tomake avoid korichi, tomar sathe kotha bolini, tomar hat dorini, SMS korini, sorry dost amar jana chilo na "AIDS" choace rug noy.

Bangla funny SMS-17.

Tai tai tai , Gorur Mangsho khai,
peter vitor kemon kore,
Bathroomete jai,
hagar Pore cheye dekhi,
jangia khuli nai.

Bangla funny SMS-18.

1 Message received,
1 cool person sent it.
1 Fool is reading it.
1 Fool get angry.
1 Fool is still reading .
1 Fool is 4warding
this SMS to another Fool.

Bangla funny SMS-19.

Din sundor, Surjo uthle! Raat sundor, Chad Uthle! Sopno sundor, Modhur hole! Sriti sundor, Purono hole! Aar tumi Sundor Ekta lez Lagale !!!

Bangla funny SMS-20.

U r 70% Smart, 75% sweet, 85% Naughty, 90% Cute & 100% Lovely. So Total: 70+75+85+90+100=420.............Oh no! Ur Totally a 420 !!!
Posted by Ahasan at Wednesday, April 15, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
52) Bangla funny SMS Collection-01

Bangla funny SMS-1.

Ek bar cheye dekho surjo k ane debo
Ek bar bole dekho chad take pere debo
Ek bar kede dekho chouk gulo muse debo
Ek bar hese dekho dat gulo venge debo

Bangla funny SMS-2.

2me Amar Ringtone, 2me Vibration
2me Amar hot GP Connection
2me Amar SMS, 2me Amar MMS,
2me Amar Hridoy Jure NETWORK COVERAGE

Bangla funny SMS-3.

Kao Kao Gonta Khanek Kore, Bangla funny sms
Kao Kao Gonta Khanek Kore,
Kao Kao 2/3 Gontao Kore,
Kao Kao ta aber Sara Rat Doray Kore....Ki kore?
Ki Abar ....MOBILE CHARGE!!

Bangla funny SMS-4.

Tur jonna anta pari akas thaka tara,
Tui bolla bachte pari oxyzen sara,
Prithibi takeo lutate pari bondou turi pai,
Abar tui bol avaba r koto mittha bola jai!

Bangla funny SMS-5.

U r BANDAR
It means:
B=Beautifull
A=Attractive
N=Naughty
D=Decent
A=Adorable
R=Romantic
R U smiling?

Bangla funny SMS-6

Voyonkor 1ta sopno dekhe ghum theke uthe gelam. Shopne dekhlam Prithibir shob 'SAGOL' mara gese. Tarpor thekei 2mar jonno tension hocche. Beche thakle miscal dio!!!

Bangla funny SMS-7.

Love Sms korlam send Priyar numberate,
Sms porlo giya mayer babar hate.
Kopal kharap hole buji koto kichu e hoy
Priyar baba Mobile a dakhai sudu voy.
Ak Sms ae lega galo Jilapir pach,
Taito akhon korina ar Mobile Sms

Bangla funny SMS-8.

2mer Satha Tanki Maira Manibag Faka,
Mase Mase Goccha Dilam Hazar Pachek Taka.
Akhon 2me Kaita Poro Amai System Koira?
Eccha Kora Size koira Day Bondo Tura Doira!

Bangla funny SMS-9.

Tomar Jonnae Boka Amar Pahar Soman Jala...
R Aj Sai Tumie Bolle Amai...
HABO BHAI 2ME HABOE ROYYA GELA!!

Bangla funny SMS-10.

Network niya Raja Rani boro payrasan,
Paira diya korlo suro chithi aadan prodan,
Chithi charai paira ekdin Rajar kacha galo,
Tina dakha Raja saheb khube raga galo,
Bari fira Raja bola ata holo ki?
Rani bola ata chilo Miss Call tao bujoni!!
Posted by Ahasan at Wednesday, April 15, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Tuesday, 14 April 2009
51) Bangla Shuvo Nobo Borsho sms Collection-01

Nobo Borsho sms- 1.

Tomar jonno Sokal, Dupur, Tomar jonno Sondha,
Tomar jonno sokol Golap,sob Rojoniogondha,
Tomar jonno sob Sur, tomar jonno Chondo,
Notun bosor boye anuk Onabil Annondo. Shuvo Nobo Borsho.

Nobo Borsho sms-2.

Tor eccha golo ure beyrak pakhna doti mele,
Dinguli tur jak na jeno emni hese khele,
Opurno na thaka jano tor kono iccha,
Ai kamonay bondo toke nobo borsher suveccha.

Nobo Borsho sms-3.

Notun Surjo, Notun Pran, Notun Shur, Notun Gan,
Notun Alloy katuk adhar, Par hoye jao okul pathar,
Katuk Bishad Asuk Horso, Suvo hok APNAR NOBOBORSHO.

Nobo Borsho sms-4.

Choitrer Raat Sheshe Shurjo Ashe Notun Beshe,
Shei Shurjer Rongin Aalo Muche Dik Tomar Jiboner Shokol Kalo,
SHUVO NOBOBORSHO

Nobo Borsho sms-5.

Sharoter haway dule Shovra Kashful,
Nodir 2 kul tai Anonde Bakul.
1 Chilte Megher 1 tukro Alo,
Kisu china shudo thako Onek Valo.
Shuvo Nobo Borsho

Nobo Borsho sms-6.

Dinguli jemoni hok thik e jai Kate,
Tobe bolo lav ki purono sriti Geta,
A Bochore puron houk tomar Sokol Asha,
Nobo Borsho te tomar jonno ata e kori prottasa.

Nobo Borsho sms-7.

Bondhu mane Nil Sagore Uchle Pora Dheu,
Bondhu mane Apon Kore Khuja Newa Kau.
Bondhu mane Dure Giyeo Thaka Kachakachi,
Sokal-bikel Janie dewea “BONDHU AMI ACHI”
Shuvo Nobo Borsho

Nobo Borsho sms-8.

Jodi Rong Chao, Dibo Fuler Nirjas;
Jodi Canvas Chao, Dibo Suvro Akash;
Bonduta Chao Jodi, Pran Die Dibo;
Chao Jodi Vule Jete,Chal Tule Nebo.
Shuvo Nobo Borsho

Nobo Borsho sms-9.

Bondhu thake Shukher Dine
Bondhu thake Dukher Dine
Boishakeri Jhoro Haway
Boshonteri Snigdho Melay
Bondhu 2mi Acho Bole
Hashte Pari Mon Khule
Shuvo Nobo Borsho

Nobo Borsho sms-10

Ting tong.. Open the door.!
K.k.? Ami sms.
Ki chao.?
Akta katha balbo.. Balo
SHUVO NOBO BORSHO...
Posted by Ahasan at Tuesday, April 14, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Tuesday, 7 April 2009
13) Bangla kabita SMS-02-copy right-ahasan-sms.blogspot.com

Bangla Kabita SMS-11

Jode kum kum mekha sajale nijeke,
Apon madhuri ongge,
Bondu 2mer pother sathe k,
Nebe ki 2mer song-ge.

Bangla Kabita SMS-12

Kisu chondo vashey thake,
Kisu thake mone,
Bose asi 2mer ashay,
Ramner fulo bone.

Bangla Kabita SMS-13

Dibbo Kore Bolchi Tumai Ar Hobena Vhul,
Hariye Tumai Aaj Amije Na Pai Vebe Kul,
Roylo Amar Ai Abedon Grohon Koro Mura…
Aager Moto E Badbo amai Nikhad Premer Dura

Bangla Kabita SMS-14

Ki Bhabe Chaibona Tomake Ami,
Jhakon Tumi Sudui Royecho Amar Sapno Jure,
Ki Bhabe Bhalobasbona Tomake Ami,
Jhakon Tumi Sudui Royecho Amar onntor Jure,

Bangla Kabita SMS-15

Ki vabe vulbo Tomake Ami,
Jhakon Tumi Sudui Royecho Amar Bhabana Jure,
Ki Bhabe Jete Di Tomake Ami,
Jhakon Tumi Sudui Royecho Amar Dehho Jure!!

Bangla Kabita SMS-16

Joto Bhalobasa Peyechi 2mar Kach Thake;
Dustu Ai Mon Chai Aro Besi Pete;
Ki Jani Tomar Modhe Ki Achhe;
ai Mon Chai 2mak Aro Besi Kase Pete.

Bangla Kabita SMS-17

Khusbhu Er Moto Tomar Modhe Miliye Jabo;
Sukun Hoye Tomar Hridoy Vore Debo;
Anubhab Kore Khusite Thakbe;
Jokhon Amay Mone Korbe;

Bangla Kabita SMS-18

Hariya Jabo Jadin Ami
Porbe Amai Mone
Ek Fota Jol Asthe Dio
Tomar Choker Kone
Sedin Jotoi Dakbe Amai
Debona Ami Sara
hoea jabo sedin ami
Nil Akasher tara.

Bangla Kabita SMS-19

Jani Na Kal Kothai Robe,
Sriti gulu rekhe jabe,
Dur akase chad ar alo,
Bondu tome theko valo

Bangla Kabita SMS-20

tumi amar borshar bristi,
tomai chara ki kore kori
nobo jiboner srishti??
Posted by Ahasan at Tuesday, April 07, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Monday, 6 April 2009
12) Bangla kabita SMS-01-copy right-ahasan-sms.blogspot.com

Bangla Kabita SMS-1

Aber jode bristi ase,
ami e 2mer prothom hobo,
lepte jawea sharir moto,
2mer gaea joria robo

Bangla Kabita SMS-2

Aber jode rodrou utha,
Megh kete jay moner,
Ami 2mer song-ge hobo,
Bono fulo boner.

Bangla Kabita SMS-3

Ami akhon ondhokare megh legese chade,
Tobu amer bashori mon 2mer jonno kade

Bangla Kabita SMS-4

Amer shoke soriea dio,
joba fuler lal,
Bondu ami 2mer nishi,
Jagbo chiro kal

Bangla Kabita SMS-5

Ami 2mer bondu hobo,
Bristi veja sharir moto,
Suddho jol a saner moto
Happy friendship day

Bangla Kabita SMS-6

Ami 2mer bondu hobo,
Shiuli fota vorer moto,
Dupur rode boter moto,
Rater ga-a tarer moto

Bangla Kabita SMS-7

Ami 2mer bondu hobo,
Jol er nicha cha-ear moto,
Nokshi tola kathar moto,
Shit ar rate omer moto

Bangla Kabita SMS-8

Roj sokale rodh pohate,
2mer bare jay,
Doro bondu amer ghore,
Shiter katha nay

Bangla Kabita SMS-9

Sara shohor khuje beray,
2mer jode dekha pay,
Chokh bujlay e 2may dekhi,
Khulle dekhi 2me nay.

Bangla Kabita SMS-10

Akhane okhane japito jibone,
Tumul bristi houk,
Betitha rodhone biroho bijone,
Futuk premer surjalok
Posted by Ahasan at Monday, April 06, 2009 0 comments Links to this post ShareThis
Labels: Bangla sms
Sunday, 5 April 2009
11) Bangla Love SMS Collection-01

Bangla Love SMS-1.

Ai Mon chai sudu tomai Valobasi,
Ai Mon chai sudu tomar kacha Aasi,
Ai Mon chai 2mer mukher aktu Hasi,
Ai Mon chai sudu thakte 2mer Pasapase

Bangla Love SMS-2.

Bestota amake dayna obosor,
Tai bole vabona amay sarthopor,
jakhane e thaki, houki joto e dure,
2me aso sarakhon ai hridoy jure

Bangla Love SMS-3.

Hridoy khula shopa dilam turi chorine,
Eccha hole agle rakhis hridoy er gohine,
Aoniccha ta chura falis kuno ek dustbine,

Bangla Love SMS-4.

Na jena na suna kokhono,Diyo nako mon.
Na jena na suna kokhono,Diyo nako mon.
Valo kore aage take jane nao,Sa kamon doron.
Aabeg ta komia alap ta jomia age jena nao tar vetor goron..Pore dio Mon!

Bangla Love SMS-5.

Hoyto tomai valobesa korechilam vhul,
Taito akhon dicchi sai vhular e mashool,
Phool vabe tumari sudu kortam sadona...
Tai bodhoy soite hochcha katar jontrona.

Bangla Love SMS-6.

Tumi achho bolei ekta notun shokal,
ekta notun alor roshni dekhi.
Shawpno dekhe beche thaker.
Ar amake ami khuje pai, ei prithibite.

Bangla Love SMS-7.

Amake sms korte thako ebong jite nao akorshonio puroshkar. 1:onek bhalobasha. 2:azibon bondhutto. 3:amar hridoye obosthan, ekdom bina mulle. Prostaber meyad totodin, ami beche achhi joto din.

Bangla Love SMS-8.

Fuler shob koli dek shubash tomay. Shurjer shob roshni jeno dey alo tomay. Amar to kichhu nei, deyar jonno tomay. Kintu ami chai, je dey she jeno shobi dey tomay.

Bangla Love SMS-9.

Hawar poroshe je gaan, shurjer aloy je ushnota, chander kirone je proshanti. Tumi na thakle bujhtei partamna. Tomer preme jibonta hoea utese modhumoy.

Bangla Love SMS-10.

Ojosro bhalobasha tomar jonno, Opirimeyo.
Ami jani ami parbona hote Majnu ba Farhad,
emonki Devdash-o. Tai bole bhebhona kom bhalobashi tomay.

**Bangla Jokes Collection
1st: ei janis to amar dictionary te na osombob bole kono kotha nei!
ami ja ichhe korte pari!
2nd: jah! Toke ebhabe thokalo dokandar!
ei jonnei bolechilam dekhe sune dictionary keno!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Chhele:baba, janoto aaj class e mam ekta question korechilo jar ans sudhu ami dite perechhi!
Baba:ei to amar sona chhele. Ki prosno korechhilen mam?
Chhele:ke blackboard e susu korechhe?
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Tourist:”ei konkal ta kar?
Guide:tipu sultan er.
Tourist: ar oi paashe oi chhoto konkal ta kar?
Guide: ota tipu sultan er chhotobelar konkal.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Woman:amar husband bazar e alu kinte gechhilo
5 din hoye gelo, ekhono fereni! Plz kichhu korun!
Inspector: thik achhe ami dekhchhi
kintu…
etokkhon apni onno kichhu to ranna korte parten!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ram:are dada, apni apnar auto er chaka keno khulchen?!
Auto-driver: apni ki kana naki!
dekhchhen an lekha achhe ‘parking only for 2 wheelers’!!
Have a nice day
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ram:are dad apni amay thokalen keno!!
Dokandar:kothya thokalam apnake! Bhalo radio i to diechhi!
Ram:chhai bhalo! Lekha chhe made in Japan aar chalale bolchhe,
this is All India Radio!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ek bachha mosha tar prothom uraan bhore ghore firlo.
Maa mosh jigges korlo: kemon laglo bachha?
Bachha mosh bollo: darun laglo, maa, sobai amar jonno hat tali dichhilo!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
USA te proti bochhor Edison er jonmodin upolokkhe 2 min load shedding hoy.
Kintu amra indian ra aro beshi honour dekhanor jonno
Sara bochhor roj 3 ghonta power cut kore tar jonmodin palon kori.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ram: kibhabe ami amar baba ke bolbo je ami ebar o fail korechhi?
Shyam: ekta telegram kor lekh.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Teacher: kew bolte parbe kakotaliyo er ekta example?
Student. Haan sir,
…………… amar maa aar baba er biyer din aar somoy ekebare same!!
eke bole kakotaliyo byapar!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Husband : ki khabar baniyechho? Gobar er moto khete lagchhe!!
Wife: hey bhogoban e kemno loker sathe biye holo amar!
tumi ki ki kheyechho go jibone?
gobor kemon khete hoy tao jano!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Recession er result:
Ekhon economy er emon obostha. Je
je….
…
Meyerao aajkal bhalobasa dekhe biye korchhe!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
2jon lok ek uchu barir chhad theke laaf dichhe
1st: eta amar 50th jump, ami recordholder.
2nd: eta amar 1st jump, ami ekjon shareholder.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ek ortho-surgeon tar patient ke bolchhe:
“apnar jonno ekta bhalo arekta kharap khobor achhe.
Bhalo khobor holo je apnar je paa ta kharap chhilo ota thik hoye gechhe.
Aar kharap khobor holo apnar je paa ta bhalo chhilo ota amar operation e kharap hoe gechhe..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
A: amar chhele ekebare sonay sohaga.
B:tomar chele smoke kore?
A:na.
B: drink kore?
A: na
B: sotty tomar chhele sonay sohaga.ta boyosh koto tomar chheler?
A: 6 maas.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Munnabhai: jodi toke kukur kamray jetar daant nei, tui ki korbi?
Circuit: are bhai eto khub i soja.
injection nebo, needle chhara.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Height of hope:
Ek chhele xam hall e bose achhe..
Se nijeke bojachhe:
…
….
Chintar kichhu nei..
..
Xam pichhiye jabe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ekta hathi, bagh ar suor ekdin kotha bolchilo nijeder moddhye.
Hathi: amar awaz sune jungle er sobai bhoy pay.
Bagh: amar gorjon e boner sob jontu kepe othe!
Suor: chho! Amake sudhu ektu kashte hoy,tatei gota duniya bhoy e kepe othe
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ami tomay sudhu etuku I bolte chai je, tumi amar khub priyo bondhu.tumi kadle,ami kadi, tumi hasle, ami hasi….tumi jokhon janala diye jhaap dao,ami niche dekhi, abar
hasi..:P
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Hey, sobsomoy mone rakhte murkhoami chhara, gyan thakte pare na, ugliness chhara, beauty thakte pare na.tai bolchhi …..
….ei world e tomar dorkar achhe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ek investor tar secretary ke bollo:
“ami bhablam amader economy boom korbe.”
Secrtary: “na sir, ota amader investment crash howar sound chhilo”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Alibaba and recession:
Alibaba aar tar 40 jon chor chhilo.
Kintu ekhon matro 30 jon chor baki achhe.
……..
Recession e 10 jon er chakri gechhe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Stock market holo emon ek jaiga jekhane
Takawala lokjon experienced loker kachhe jay.
Aar experience wala lokjon taka pay.
Takawala lokera pay sudhu experience.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Sensex e 50% er loss hoechhe.
Ekhon sona, jomi kinle sob jole jabe.
Tai
Love
Friendship
Relationship
Feelings
Esob e invest koro
Sobsomoy bhalo return pabe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Chhele: baba, amake choshma kine dao, ami durer jinis kichhu dekhte pai na!
baba chhele ke baire niye gelo.
Surjo er dike dekhiye bollo: ota dekhte pachhis?
Chheleo bollo:haan,pabo na keon?
Baba:tobe re beta! Aar kotodur dekhte chaas tui?!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ram:”ei shyam,amai amar money bag barite rekhe esechhi, amay 1000 taka dhaar dite parbi?”
shyam ram ke 10 taka dhriye diye bollo:
“ja chinta koris na, riksha niye bari ja,
Aar money bag ta niye aye”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ek mahajna ek kanjus er bari gelo taka ushul korte.
Mahajan:”tomar baba amr kachh theke 5000 taka dhaar niechhe
Tar 10% suder rate e 1 bochhor e koto hoy?
Chhele: kichhui na.
Mahajan: tumi dekhchhi onko ekebarei jano na.
Chhele:”ami onko jani,kintu apni amar babake janen na….:P
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Doctor Patient Jokes in Bengali
Doctor: apnar choshma lagbe.
Patient: apni ki kore bujhlen apni to amay check o korlen na.
Doctor: apni jeta dorja bhebe bhetore dhuklen, seta asole ekta janal chhilo.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ek patient sue chhilo ek hospital er bed e.
Patient:doctor, ami amar paa e kichhu feel korchhi na!
Doctor: ami jani, ami bhul kore apnar hath duto kete felechhi.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Dactar ra sobsomoy hotash koren!
Ami 2 maas por doctor er appointment pelam.
Dactar er kachhe gelam.
Uni bollen I m sorry. Issh! Apni jodi 2 maas age amar kachhe asten!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Patient:amar bachar chance koto ta ?
Doctor: 100%,medical theory bole ei rog e 10 joner moddhe 9 jon rugi mara jai.
……….. Apni amar 10 number rugi.
ager 9 jon maara gechhen.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Student and Exam Jokes in Bengali
Manusher brain ek ajob jontro!
Dine 24 ghonta, bochhore 365 din kaaj kore
Jnmo theke kaaj kore.
Sudhu exam hall e dhokar agei kaj bondho kore dey!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Teacher:achha boloto surjo beshi dorkari na chaand?
Student: sir chaand.
keno na raate jokhon kono alo thake na tokhon chaand alo dey.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Teacher: je onnojone sunte na chaileo onorgol kotha bole jay take ki bola hoy?
Student: sir,
tader bola hoy..
….
Teacher.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Teacher: jano george washington tar babar pota gachh kete felechhilen aar nijei baba ke se kotha bolechilen. Tar baba take kono sasti den ni. Keno bolte paro?
Student:kenona kuthar ta tokhono tar hath ei chhilo.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ekbar ek skul theke sob student der museum dekhte niye jawa holo.
Ekj student dekhte giye ekta purono murti bhenge fele!
Curator rege giye bollo: “jano ei murti ta 100 bochhor purono?”
Student:” tao bhalo, ami bhablam ota notun!”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Teacher Student Exam Professor School and College Jokes in Bengali
Exam hall e xam dite giye
Jodi dekho paper tough.
Chinta koro na.
Chokh bondho koro aar nijeke bolo:
“ei subject ta khub interesting,
ami ei subject ta abar porte chai.”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ekta ghumonto bagh
Ekta uttejito kukurer theke beshi shatiman,
Temni
Ek ghumonto chhatro
Ek uttejito teacher er theke beshi bhalo.
By,
“Nikhil Bharatiyo Back Benchers Parishad”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Prof: murkho ra eto proshno kore je gyani ra birokto hoye poren.
Student:jani sir, amra sob exam ei eta bujhte pari.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ekjon lecturer maa er cheyeo mahan.
Keno?
Maa sudhu tar bachha der ghum parate paare.
Kintu lecturer sob bachhader ghum pariye dey..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Exam e aschhe T20:
Xam time 1 ghonta aar full marks 50 kombe.
15 min por por break,
Free hit marks thakbe kothin question er jonno.
Prothom 30 min powerplay:kono supervisor thakbe na.
Cheer girls thakbe jara proti page lekha sesh hole nachbe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
janam,moron ekbar.
Bhalobasa o ase ekbar.
Biye o hoy ekbar.
Kintu ei xam keno ase bar bar!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Comedy Jokes in Bengali
Kichhudin age amake ekta meye call korechilo:”hello, tumi amar barite chole eso,kew nei barite.
Ami meyetar bari giye dekhi sotty kew barite nei…
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Ami tomay sudhu etuku I bolte chai je, tumi amar khub priyo bondhu.tumi kadle,ami kadi, tumi hasle, ami hasi….tumi jokhon janala diye jhaap dao,ami niche dekhi, abar
hasi..:P
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Hey, sobsomoy mone rakhte murkhoami chhara, gyan thakte pare na, ugliness chhara, beauty thakte pare na.tai bolchhi …..
….ei world e tomar dorkar achhe
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Amar raate ghum nei,
Amar dine kaaj nei,
Ami bhagwan ke jigges korlam,”am I in love?”
Bhagwan bollen:”na botsyo, samnei tomar result..”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Talent, bhagyo ar problem er difference ki?
2to chele 1 ta meyeke bhalobase=problem
1ta chhele 2to meyeke bhalobase=talent
2to meye ekta chhele ke bhalobase=bhaggyo.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
attitude kake bole?
3te pipre ekta hathi ke aste dekhlo.
1st: amra ota ke mere felbo.
2nd:amra or thang bhenge debo.
3rd: bechara ke chhere de, amra 3jon o eka.eta thik noi.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Raate chand dine alo, keno tomay lage bhalo?
Glap lal kokil kalo,sobar cheye tumi bhalo.
Akash nil,majhe sada,
gowal ghore tumi badha…
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Hey! Amar ekta upokar korbe? Tomar ekta chhobi tule amay send korona..
Ami cards khelchhi ,kintu joker ta khuje pawa jachhe na….
**Bangla Jokes Collection
jodi kono meyeke bipode help koro,
se sobsomoy tomar kotha mone rakhbe.
sudhu jokhon se abar kono bipode porbe..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
teacher:achha boloto,
“i am beautiful” eta kon tense hobe in english?
student:mam, eta surely past tense i hobe!

**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekdin wife ekta gadha ke dhore bari niye aschhilo
husband:ei patha take kothay pele?
wife:dekhte pachho na? eta gadha!
husband:are gadha kei to jigges korlam!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
soldier:sir, amader palabar poth nei.
amader shotrura chardik theke ghire felechhe!
major:darun.
ekhon amara tahole jekono dike attack korte pari!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta mota lok ekta train er kamra te bose chhilo.
sei dekhe ekta lok moja kore bollo:
dada,ei kamra ki sudhu hathi der jonno?
fat man:na na dada,
apnader mtoto badro ra chaile boste pare..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
diner:ki je koro na!
dim gulo te eto nun keno diechho?
waiter:sir, kichhu mone korben na plz.
asole murgi ta high pressure e bhugchhilo tai
dimgulo nonta!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta chhele ekdin naach dekhte gelo
tar maa rege jigges korlen:
okhane giye emon kichu dekhisni to jeta tor dekha uchit noy?!
son:haa. ami babake dekhlam
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta chhele ar ekta meye park e bose chhilo..
chheleta meyetake kiss korte gelo.
girl:uhu! biyer age esob kichhu noy!
boy:dnt worry! dear. amar biye hoye gechhe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
boyfrnd:i love u
grlfrnd:mee too
boyfrnd:tumi amay kotota bhalobaso?
grlfrnd:tumi amay jotota bhalobaso thik tototai.
boyfrnd:cheater! ami bhabtam tumi amay sotty bhalobaso!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekjon sottikarer musci lover kake bole?
ekta meye bathroom e gaan gaichhe
snan korte korte…
aar ekta chhele keyhole er kachhe
giye nijer chokh na use kore
kaan use korchhe!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
teacher:Algebra:
a=b
aar b=c
mane
a=c
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekhon amay erokom arekta example bolo.
student:sir, ami apnake bhalobasi.
aar apni panra meyeke bhalobasen.
taar mane holo, ami apnar meyeke bhalobasi…
**Bangla Jokes Collection
chhele aar meyer modhhe ki farak?
jodi ekta chhele ekt meyeke chithhi lekhe,
loke bole”loafer”
aar jodi kono meye kono chhelek chithi lekhe,
take loke bole”pffer”
tofat bujhle?
**Bangla Jokes Collection
buyer:ami ki kore bujhbo je eta khati modhu?
seller:apnar kukur take din khete.
jodi na khay tahole bujhben eta khati modhu
buyer:aar jodi amar kukur et kheye ney?
seller:tahole bujhben eta sottikarer kukur noy..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
wife:amar sathe 10 bochhor?
husband:jeno ek second er moto.
wife:1000 taka ki?
husband:ekta coin
wife:ok,amay 10 ta coin dao.
husband:ek second daro..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Hilarious Bengali Jokes
ekta juboti meye ek buro lok ke biye korlo.
sobai jiggges korlo:
“er modhhe tumi ki dekhle?”
girl:”ek to er income, aar tarpor er din o kom..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
himesh ekta picture joom korbe.
ki kore?
?
?
?
?
?
“zara zoom zoom,
zara zoom zoom…”
**Bangla Jokes Collection
bondhura,
ami gandhijir photo collect korchhi
tomader sobar kachhe tai abedon
kichhu photo diye amay help koro.
sudhu ektai condition achhe:
photo ta 500 othoba 1000 takar note er opor thakte hobe
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ami ekjon bharate khuni.
amai poisar jonno khun kori.
ami ekjon khuni
ami poisar jonno khun kori
kintu tumi chinta koro na.
tumi to amar bondhu,
tai tomay ami bina poisay khun korbo!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
teacher:kono book bestseller hote gele
book tate ki ki thaka uchit?
student:sir,
book er cover e ekta meye
aar meyer gaye no cover.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
boy:tumi amay bhalobaso karon,
aamar baba amar jonno onek taka rekhe gechhen.
tai na??
girl:na idiot!
ami tomay bhalobasi karon.
ami parowa korina, ke tomay eto taka rekhe gechhe!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
chhele driving licence pawar por tar babar 1st advice:
“dekho baba jekhane hok ar jake hok dhakka maaro,
kintu sudhu sosta jinish ei dhakka mero.”
***Bangla Jokes Collection
husband:amader chheleta puro amar brain peyechhe.
wife:amaro tai mone hoy..
karon amar brain ta ekhono amar sathei achhe!

**Bangla Jokes Collection
man:tomara babar boyosh koto?
son:amar aar amar babar boyosh same
man:ki!! eta ki kore sombhob??!:O
son:are,amai jonmanor por i to uni baba hoyechhen!
***Bangla Jokes Collection
diner:ami ei pocha machh khete parchhina.
tomader manager kothay? dako onake.
waiter:sorry sir, onake dekeo laav nei.
uni o oi pocha machh khaben na.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
keno hathi ra
eto bor
kalo
hoy?
karon.
..
.
.
.
.
ora jodi sda, ar chhoto arhoto
tahoel oder ke
tablet bola hoto
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Funny Bengali SMS and Jokes
ilu mane ki?
i=i
l=love
u=urdu
ami urdu bhalobasi.
tumi ki bhable?
i love ujbuk..
setao thik,ami tomakeo bhalobasi.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
husband aar gadha er modhhye ki farak?
ans:husband gadha hote pare.
kintu
gadha ra etotao gadha noy je husband hobe!

**Bangla Jokes Collection
meye ar chumbok er modhhe ki farak?
?
.
.
.
chumboke er ekta positive side thake…
**Bangla Jokes Collection
jodi prithibi tomar charpashe bonbon kore ghurte thake,
aar tomar hridoy er spondon bere jay,
tumi ki bhabbe egulo prem er lokkhon?
?
?
?
na munna,
eke bole high blood pressure!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
balish holo sottkarer prem er moto.
tumi jokhon bipode poro tokhon oke jorie dhorte paro
jokhon kado,tokhon er opor sue kadte paro.
aar eke ador korte paro jokhon khub anondo hoy.
sottykarer bhalobasa chai,
bazar jao, 100 taka diye ekta balish kine aano..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Yash Johar ektu notun film banachhe
uni notun kono talent khujchen.
ami tomar naam suggest korechho
plz onar sathe giye dekha koro.
cinemar naam.
..
..
‘Aqal Ho Na Ho’
**Bangla Jokes Collection
wife:ami more jete chai.
husband:ami o more jete chai
wife:keno? tumi keno morte chao?!
husband:eto khushi amar soibe na.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
bhalobasa bondhutter pore hote pare.
kintu
bondhutto bhalobasar por hote pare na
karon.
..
osudh sudhu morar agei kaaj kore,
more gele aar kono kaje ase na
**Bangla Jokes Collection
commerce prof: kono business suru korar sob cheye important finace soure ki?
student:sir, father-in-law
**Bangla Jokes Collection
keno lsobar eker beshi grlfrnd thaka uchit.
karon monopoly sobsomoy baje dike niye jai.
aar competetion sobsomoy unnotir pothe niye jai..

**Bangla Jokes Collection
sudhu 20% chheleder mathay budhhi thake.
tahole bakider kachhe ki thake?
.
.
.
?
?
tader kachhe grlfriend thake!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
father:baba, ebar jonmodine tomar ki gift chai?
son:beshi kichhu na baba.
sudhu ekta radio,
jeta ekta sportscar er sate attach thakbe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
teacher:tumi ekta opodartho!
jano, tomar boyoshe Bill Gates class e 1st hoto!
student:kichhu mone korben na sir!
kintu apnar boyoshe hitler suicide korechilo!

**Bangla Jokes Collection
grlfrnd:uff boddo tight!
boyfrnd:darao,ami thelchhi.
grlfrnd:jor kore dokao.
boyfrnd:ah.. parchhi na
grlfrnd:issh! byatha lagchhe.
boyfrnd:bad dao
..
..
.
.
ekta notun wedding ring kinte hbe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta meye ekdin greeting card kinte gelo
grl:apnar kachhe kono romantic card achhe?
shopkeeper:eta dekho:”to the boy i ever loved”
grl:bah! great!
amake ei card 10 ta din.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
biyer somoy keno husband wife hath dhore thake?
karon etai riti.
jemon boxer ra fight er age kore thake!!

**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta idur ekta beral ke ki bhabe propose korbe?
….
?
?
??
“Billo Rani Kaho Tou Abhi Jaan De Doon..
O Billo Rani..!!;-)
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Moral of ghajini movie:
jokhon i nijer girlfriend er sathe dekha korte jabe,
nijer cell phone nite bhulo na.
aar
jokhon khub bipode porbe,
nijer mobile phone silent rakhbe.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
tumi nachte jano?
?
?
?
jano na!
.
.
.
chesta koro
.
..
.
sotty parona?!
.
.
.
tar mane tumi pappu.
karon only pappu can’t dance..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
girl:dear,amader engagement er din tumi amay ring debe to?
boy:sure, kotha theke ring korbo tomay?
landline na mobile??
**Bangla Jokes Collection
jokhon akash e kalo megh kore,
tomar kotha i mone pore.
jokhon bristi hoy,
tomar kotha i mone pore.
jokhon sei bristi te ami bhije jai,
tokhon o tomakei sudhu mone pore.
ebaar boloto amar chhata ta kobe ferot debe?!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
doctor:apni aar 2 ghontar moddhe mara jaben.
apni ki karur sathe dekha korte chan?
patient:haan, amai ekjon bhalo doctor er sathe dekha korte chai.
**Bangla Jokes Collection
teacher:who is Mahatma gandhi?
student:mahatma gandhi holen oi lokta jini
Munnabhai ke nijer girlfriend ke impress korar byapare help korechilen…
**Bangla Jokes Collection
wife:issh! ami jodi newspaper hotam!
tahole saradin tomay hath e,tomar kachhe thaktam!
husband:sotty, tumi jodi amar newspaper hote!
tahole roj ami ekjon notun petam!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
biye holo onekta public toilet er moto!
jara baire dariye thake, tara dhokar jonno mukhiye thake.
aar jara vetore achhe tara beronor jonno mukhiye thake!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
husband aar wife holo garir tyre er moto.
ekta kharap hoye gelei gari cholte pare na!
tai ..
sob somoy ekta spare tyre rakhbe..
**Bangla Jokes Collection
Bhogoban sob jayga te thakte parben na bole
tini maa er shristi korechhen.
odike shoitan o sob jayga te thakte parbe na..
tai..
shashuri der shristi hoechhe!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
hi!
ami agami robibar e biye korchhi
tai ekta chhoto party o hobe.
khub kom lokjon kei dekchhi.
tumi o eso plz.
kono gift aante hobe na.
sudhu paarle biye korar moto ekta patri niye eso!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
ekta meye ekta chhele ke bollo:
tumi khub sundor,
khub handsome,
khub mishti..
oops..sorry..
tomake mishti bolte parbo na.
tahole pipre ra kheye sesh kore felbe!!
**Bangla Jokes Collection
sundor ke?
tumi.
buddhiman ke?
tumi.
mishti ke?
tumi.
ke bhalo bondhu?
tumi
ke lier?
seta holam ami!